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So of course, the dignified behaviors and attitudes that go along with these past eras are also looked down upon. When you come to a door.. I hate that my ex would always be the first to the door and never give me a chance to open for her. It will help them feel connected to man tradition, confident in their position as your friend or companion, and reverse some of the very noxious trends that have prevailed over manners.
To do that, we also need ladies to act like ladies. Give us a chance to show our affection with these traditions and appreciate them in the spirit they are given. And then, live up to those tokens by being a lady yourself. Dress with some class, that means a degree of modesty. For guys and gals alike, manners all come down to being respectful and generous to those around you. Dignity is about maintaining respect for yourself and the share of human existence you are a part of.
But I did want to at least say how impressed I am that there are so many well thought out, articulate and concise arguments going on in this forum. Sure, there are some people spewing nonsense, but there are a good many people who argue their opinions in a reasonable manner. With intelligence and a clearly formed view of their ideas and perspectives. So, good on you, anonymous ranters. For handling yourselves with intelligence, and more or less polite disposition.
This is some seriously beta euphoric friendzone-material bullshit right here. Women of today are neurotic self-destructive idiots who only respond positively when they are fed attention and respect the same way you feed a lab rat a pellet of food when it negotiates the maze properly. Is that the way things should be? And I prefer to live in the real world, not some useless look-pretty fantasy land. Thankfully, swinging women do not typically pose any real threat to grown men.
These issues can usually be resolved peacefully. On the off-chance that a woman continues her violent tirade, such extreme circumstances may require a proportional level of self-defense. If such circumstances were to transpire or if light physical abuse repeats, then the relationship likely needs to end. I see boys high school age doing things now toward each other that would have gotten us beaten up 20 yrs ago. Who stands between the unsavory types and his date? Who holds the door?
Who walks on the street side? The neutralizing of gender roles seems like it could become a long-term societal problem. I would disagree as to the last one. This is an article written for men. I want to share my testimony with the public at large about what this man called Dr. Malaa just made for me, just the man to bring back my Ex husband lost me with his great spell, I married my husband we were together for a long time and we loved ourselves, but when I was unable to give a child of c2 years left me and told me I can not go more then I was now looking for ways to bring it back until a friend of mine says me about this man called Dr.
Malaa and give me your email contact bestspellhome. No, women today have no right to such behavior. The bra burners are the reason men do not act like this in the first place. Like my mother and father taught me and my sister, behave like a man be treated like a man, behave like a woman and be treated like a woman. Our four-mothers of the sixties made that choice and because of it they killed the chivalrous nature of our society. They made it an insult for a man to hold open a door for them, pay for the date they invited them to, or hold their chair for them.
Contrary to the modern concept of today which is get everything for nothing, you have to earn respect it can not be expected or demanded. My Parents have bestowed these to me at an early stage, I am lucky to know these by heart. I have a wife that loves and appreciates these traits in me. Actually those letters were fare from work of fiction. Proven to be real people who lived and died and wrote letters.
Just because you dont happen to believe in what they say does not give you the right to falsely state that they did not exist. Actually Chivalry is about being humble. That is how I was instructed. To put other before yourself, protecting others who who are unable to protect themselves, to honor people who came before. Its about showing respect. Only a few are worthwhile because they apply to ALL human interactions. You cant just sit there staring at your phone, chewing with your mouth open and complain that guys dont pull your chair out.
It goes both ways ladies! You could go to jail also, you could accidentally kill her. Try subduing or getting away first. Seriously, can people not handle their business without going for brain damage? Chivalry is dead because men have given up on being chivalrous. I was taught these things as a child and have always routinely practiced them. After 45 years of marriage, I still treat my wife and most other women the same way.
However, a few years ago I had the misfortune of working alongside a capital-F feminist who considered these simple courtesies to be demeaning and degrading. After she lashed out at me for opening a door for her, I simply ignored her.
I felt better and I trust that she enjoyed being treated like the jerkette that she was. Ladies—Do you feel that women have a responsibility to reciprocate in some way?
Is there a feminine equivalent to chivalry? My boyfriend of two years left me for another girl because I accused him of seeing another girl and since then i have been trying to get him but he refuse to come back to me, he was not responding to my call or email and he even unfriend me on face-book and he told me that he is done with me. When women start acting like ladies again, I think men will start acting like gentlemen, and vice versa. I refuse to act chivalrous with the ridiculous behavior that modern feminism and feminists show today.
They scream equality, but want you to be chivalrous and put them on a pedistal…. I will be thankful for her making it and will let her know. Good luck with the blog. My Dad told me to sit in the car until the Gentleman opens the door for me. So after sitting in the car for over an hour, Daddy came out to open the door for me.
You could walk away, for one thing. That does not take training; it takes maturity. JollyTexan, nothing personal, but there are situations where men need to hit back. Violence is very rarely necessary, but when it is there is no gender to it.
So true, not just cowards. Now if the woman is hitting because the man is hitting up on her, or trying to force himself on her, that is doubly—no vastly more cowardly and unmanly.
And the woman has all the justification to hit the guy where it hurts-or use her 2nd amendment rights if necessary. After all, women are not a superior social caste… are they? Alessandro, yes, there are rules of manners for women, but for women as women and ladies. Just as these rules are for men as men.
Yes, there is a difference, but Western civilization has always taught the men to be men and protect the women so they act like women. Yes, the modern feminist movement and the culture in general tries to turn men into women and women into men.
All human being should reciprocate, right? Personally I find being treated like some kind of breakable princess deplorable. I refuse to be put up on some pedestal any longer so that as soon as I make a single mistake, proving that I am in fact human instead of a doll, I am broken up with.
Men, why is it so hard for you to look for an equal partner? You are making things complicated for yourselves. Emburr, respectfully, the point of such manners is not to put women on a pedestal as if she were a statue, but to honor and protect her.
No you are not doll and the culture so often tries to degrade women and make them dolls and sex objects. And while men and women are equal, there are differences including men and women each having their own strengths-and weaknesses. But the reality is that men are physically stronger and in this often sick brutal world, a real man will protect a woman not use her. And simply, a real man will treat his woman like the Princess she deserves to be treated, and that is with chivalry.
Women get treated like ladies until they prove otherwise. Unfortunately, there are far fewer ladies than there are gentlemen today. Correct, that does not make it true or untrue.
Its absolute untruthfulness is clear, yet separate from the ungentlemanly statement. Just being female is enough to guarantee a huge lack of being respected. Houmid, respectfully, sir, a man treats a woman like a lady whether she deserves it or not. And she usually does. He does it because he is a real man and true gentleman. Otherwise, that rationale can be used to justify abusing women.
Open a door for a woman today and half the time they cuss you out. Women, as a whole, gave up the right to be treated as Ladies when they started acting like men loosing all real femininity. Sure, help you mother with her chair, etc. As for picking up the check every time, who are you kidding! Another article showing how far the independence of women has degraded — to the point where articles like this commonly appear in an attempt to remind men that they need assistance constantly.
Women, feminism has won the culture war. You do not get any of the stuff listed here anymore now that you are equal to men. You get to be treated like just another guy, at best just a friendly competitor.
Many times you are just a threat and an enemy, since you go for the same job, resources, and positions. Yeah, the and s were definitely a time when men treated women right. This is a straw man argument. There were many, many great things that came out of the s and s, but you should also check your history. Chivalry predates these timeframes to the early Middle Ages.
Sadly many schools misinform students today with false histories that demonize the past while glorifying radical ideologies that so often degrade women, men and all people.
Our culture has many things that are not so hot to brag about. Our last century plus has probably been the most barbaric in Western civilization with more wars, death camps, killings and tyranny that any before. Yet as our society has gotten farther and farther from the God of the Bible who gives human dignity and freedom, again per above, there is more brutality to women and men than ever before despite the talk.
For example, we just have to look at movies, TV, advertisements to see how women in this so-called age of liberation have degraded women to sex-toys and objects while degrading men to predators in the name of sexual liberation. And that morphs into sex and other human trafficking. But yes, while maybe previous generations had their blind spots-like not allowing women to vote, the reality is as we compare attitudes and actions of the way men and cultures treated women and years ago, although no doubt there were exceptions, the myth-busting reality is that it strongly appears that men in those earlier centuries had a lot more respect and honor for women in many ways.
Just witness the facts I cite above, plus the earlier rules of etiquette you cite above based on earlier attitudes towards women. Rules of ordinary honor a man should show to a woman which several have poo-pooed which is evidence of these points.
Another example, Kris and all. This is the historical incident of a sinking ship called the Birkenhead if I recall right.
This was a British ship I guess perhaps in the early or mids which carried men, women and children. The ship for some reason began to sink-in shark infested waters. The men could have used their physical strength to overpower the women and take the life boats to save themselves-as no doubt some might do today. But this was a day and culture when men were taught true chivalry based on the Christian value system of laying down your life for those you love-not just superficial manners, and where a man lays his life down for the more defenseless like women and children.
So the men let the women and children have the life boats to be saved. And the men went down in the shark infested waters to be eaten alive by the sharks. On the other hand, there was a French ship under similar circumstances-believe more or less a like time. As a result, when the ship went down, -trying to recall details-but it was something like this- the men beat the women with the life boats oars and took the life boats for themselves.
Now those might seem like extreme examples. But a human-a man or woman-tends to act true to their character whether in ordinary daily life or emergency situations. So ladies, if a man does not display such chivalry to you when you are courting or getting to know him, good chance he will not when married or under emergency circumstances when your life is at risk. Not saying a man has to be perfect, as none of us are. But that is a big risk to take. This could make a great article.
We can learn so much from history…it gives us our blueprint as men. I spent some time with a wealthy man who seemed very refined and well-mannered. He would shoulder up to me while we walked in order to keep pace, never ahead or behind. He also would very slightly grace my elbow or lumbar while we walked and spoke. How did he know to do that?? They were gestures I really appreciated.
Is there a book or a class? I want to teach my boys to be like that. And, I say good riddance. Arko, respectfully, if what you say is true, that chivalry, basically a man treating a woman with dignity and respect is over, then human civilization as a whole is over, as we just have cave men barbarians raping and killing women as other cultures-and even religions have practiced in t he past such as the Vikings.
No, sir, it is not over. And again respectfully, you sound sadly bitter. Is that supposed to shame me some way? Is a dramatic one-liner insult, the only thing in your verbal inventory? A gentleman picks up the check every time? This rule is why many men are uncomfortable dating a woman who makes more money than they do. Good stuff, but I might disagree with the last sentence of 9. When my husband asked my father for his blessing I did not feel like a little girl or like my opinion did not matter but rather I felt blessed.
Blessed and respected that my then boyfriend realized how important my dad is to me and that he respected me and my dad enough to include him in one of the most important decisions of both our lives. This is really sad. Do you realize that your father thought he owned you and that your husband thinks he owns you? As if you are a piece of furniture and not a human being.
And yet you think they respect you? You are a piece of property to them and you deserve better. You deserve respect as an adult person who can make your own decisions. He would ask the guy if he had asked me first…. The families should already know each other by the time there is a proposal, and hopefully already get along, so asking permission like that is sexist, insulting and just odd in most situations these days.
Way to progress, ladies! And modern feminism has only come to such great strength because of the awfulness that women used to be subjected to. The picking up the tab thing comes from a time when women were expected to be barefoot, pregnant and in the kitchen, and men were the only ones that worked. Times have changed, women have jobs and money now too. In essence, we are attempting to dominate the mental sphere.
It is only through that that we will be able to explore this vast universe of which we are a part. It was a derisive term used by the English to denote the weakness of a Dutch man during the Anglo-Dutch wars.
Many gentleman practices are derived from the English. Another two — he does NOT hoot when he arrives to pick her up for a date.
He gets out of the car and fetches her from the house before opening the car door to help her in. Unfortunately, even in my generation baby boomers there is much of this that has been forgotten. I like how you actually explained exactly why most of these made sense at one time but are no longer applicable, before saying they should still be applied.
But then that last one… A woman is not a possession that passes from one man to another. You are going so damn far out of your way to prove that not only do you not have respect for that woman, not only do you have no respect for any woman, but you actively disrespect them.
The children and those raising them are capable enough of determining what their own gender is and means. Not only are you teaching young boys that women cannot do anything for themselves, you are teaching young and impressionable girls that they are helpless and need the assistance of a man in order to accomplish things.
If my child were in your class, I would go to great lengths to have them removed. Or does everyone forget that he repeatedly sexually abused her and she finally snapped? From experience- I was raped as a teenager. I just wanted to get out of there and get clean. I am not in favour of using the person gender as an excuse. There are far too many hags out there who think their sex is a free pass to commit violence against men. Could someone please guide me to the 21 lost traditions of women?
Good for the gander is good for the goose. THIS is how men are enslaved to women. Be a man, take care of yourself, she can take care of herself, too. Go your own way. Stop being simps, grow some nutz. What kind of women are you gunning for? Where do you get these stats? The stats are everywhere, my friend. Beta males are the fall back. Quality women are absolutely attracted to kindness. I married Miss USA. Quality women are attracted to quality men. Women with issues are attracted to jerks, and then nice guys with their own issues allow themselves to be the fallback.
I agree a guy should do all these things. It is sad that many guys do not. There is also a fear from some guys that militant feminists will label them as chauvinists if they do these things, or maybe even accuse them of sexism to their employers.
I have sadly seen this happen. I agree with everything except I would never hit any LADY. But, there are plenty of woman out there that need a good punch in the teeth every now and then.
This may be totally off subject, but grasping at the straw that I should indeed be hurt. I am happily married to an amazing man…nearly 15 years of marriage and 20 years together and 3 children under our belt.
My husband is a social guy, great sense of humor and a doting husband. He makes me feel beautiful, loved and adored all the time. We were on our way home from a formal function a couple of weeks ago and a mutual friend a guy came on to me, in a flattering way at first then in a dark threatening way, I was caught off guard as he was a great friend and I adore his wife.
We have a blast as a foursome at events and functions and on family get togethers. My husband completely dismissed my concerns along with the complete description of what was inappropriately professed to me in a whisper by this man…our would be friend.
Blindsided and turned off by his lack of concerN. Where is chivalry on the most basic personal level between husband and wife?? GOD forbid if one of our 2 boys would ever dismiss such a charge from their future wives. Thank you for writing such an exemplary article! I wish everyone could read this and imply what improvements need to be made in their own lives.
I appreciate the simple reminders of what I and my husband need to continue to instill in our 3 boys. I always tried to match up to the latter tough guys and would feel silly or too pampered when the gentlemen were around. I always come up with some excuse or reason to validate the compliment. I was once told that doing so was actually being rude and showing a lack of gratitude for their kindness. Sorry to ramble on.
I do really appreciate this article and hope to continue to learn from them to help my husband and I teach our boys these timeless characteristics every boy and man should have.
Thanks for this article. Regards, wholesale men clothing. But if you want to do it anyway for the formality and tradition of it, then ask BOTH her parents. Because her mother matters too. You had me until the last one. Thank you for sharing your wisdom. There are still gentlemen out there and the world is a better place for it.
First understand I believe in every one of these points. But One need to look no further than modern day Feminist Movement to see why Chivalry is dead.
One cannot be beaten about the head repeatedly on a daily basis by Feminists and not lose these values. Men and women are different, and that is why Chivalry was created, to protect women from scumbag men!
Just look at 9, 16, and All created to be there to protect women from being assaulted by other men! So what if it will turn a woman off. What, are you just trying to get sex from women? All of this idiocy is not going to make a comeback, not in the way you hope anyway. Men are finally waking up, and pursuing their own dreams, giving themselves permission to actually live their own lives, instead of becoming a beast of burden.
Oh, and thanks for the Ritalin comment, you have real class putting men down for being wired to have lots of energy when they are young, it helps us become that big strong protector you kept taking about. Unlike stagnant classrooms that stifle and reprimand us for thinking outside the box, exploring or world, and not, by nature, sitting down and listening to someone talk, instead of do.
It takes a serious lack of imagination to believe that all victims can simply walk away from women trying to seriously harm them. What a bunch of garbage. Everything you mentioned including paying for dates should be done equally by both sexes. This is a list for pathetic betas.
You want equality there it is you got it. Any of you guys want to laugh at that? Want to call me something? Well I laugh at you for being a drone then, and not having the fortitude to actually go your own way. Go back to the penny slots. Get off the computer and get to the gym.
Why is it that people think its OK to expect men to always do for women and when anyone says what women should do for men is sexist?!
Enough of this sexist double standard and its articles like this that makes society think its ok for men to get more jailtime for the same crime a woman gets, that its ok to hit men and men have to be the ones to either take it or find a different solution while the woman does whatever she wants, that men still have to follow what men did in the past like work and take care of the woman and make her happy while no one should expect a woman to follow any of the things women did in the past like take care of the man.
Nothing should be expected from anyone period. Today, there are very masculine women and feminine men, and some men do like getting manhandled by women. Perhaps I should designate this article towards guys with a masculine disposition who are courting women with a feminine disposition, but politeness and kindness are absolutely not sexist. There are no expectations period. Everyone has the right to live in mediocrity, and there is no judgement from this site if you choose that route.
However, this is an article geared towards becoming a better man; a man discontent with living an ordinary life, and wants an extraordinary life. A man who knows his identity and is confident in himself has no problem being kind and being a servant leader. I disagree with one: Or it could suggest you have respect for the family, and you desire to be a good son-in-law who wants to foster a good relationship with her father.
The only situation where asking the father is OK if all parties openly know that the act of asking is fake, nothing depends on it, and it is only done as a ritual to express respect. This may differ in other countries, but in the US, asking her father is a ritual to express respect.
It would be better to severe a relationship with her family by the father saying no, than by the future groom being disrespectful and not asking.
I earn respect as an equal man through my actions. Btw, this practice is not only disrespectful to the daughter, but also to the mother. Why is she not being asked or mentioned in your list? Is she some secondary person in your book too? Marriage is a mutual agreement between two free, equal people. Parents, priests, friends, etc. The ritual in its original meaning came out of the Romantic era.
The suitor would ask the father because the woman finally had a choice. Before this time, neither the man nor the woman had a choice. The decisions were made by both families. If you want respect earn it with your actions by treating him with respect, not as your subservient. Every other point makes sense, but this one is just a dishonourable practice towards women.
Vivian After being in marriage with Clem for 8 years,he broke up our marriage, I did everything possible to bring our marriage back but all was in vain, I wanted him back so much because of the love I have for him and for our two kinds, just to make a better mom to our kinds, and to protect my family.
I begged him with everything even with the name of our kinds, I made promises but he refused. I explained my problem to someone online and she suggested that I should rather contact a spell caster that could help me cast a spell to bring our marriage back but I am the type that never believed in spell, I had no choice than to try it, I mailed the spell caster, and he told me there was no problem that everything will be okay before four days, that my husband will return to me before four days, he cast the spell and surprisingly in the second day, it was around 4pm.
My husband called me, I was so surprised, I answered the call and all he says was that he was so sorry for everything that happened, that he is very very sorry for the pains he has put me and with our kinds, that he wanted us to return to him, that he loves us so much. I was so happy and went to him with our kinds, that was how we started living together happily again as one family, Since then I have made promise that anybody I know that have a relationship problem, I would be of help to such person by referring him or her to the only real and powerful spell caster who helped me with my own marriage problems and who is different from all the other ones out there.
Anybody could need the help of the spell caster, his email and his cell phone contact. I begged him with everything even with the name of our kinds,made promises but he refused. I was so happy and went to him with our kinds, that was how we started living togethe happily again as one family, Since then I have made promise that anybody I know that have a relationship problem, I would be of help to such person by referring him or her to the only real and powerful spell caster who helped me with my own marriage problems and who is different from all the other ones out there.
I am full of happiness and delight, on the grounds that I have my significant other once more at my palm. My partner left me for just about 2 years. Until I met with this extraordinary spell caster called Lawrence, who did magic for me to get him back in less than 42hrs.
I exhort anybody going to this site to run to him promptly for any relationship offer assistance. He is an extremely effective and experience spell caster you can get help from. There are lot of ways to achieve this mostly when your husband is the kind that go about cheating on you even with your knowledge. I know it hurts and most of us think is better to walk out but look when you are married to a wealthy or powerful man your options are not just as easy as walking out.
Because in the long you have so much to loss so this is what i think its best to do. A a woman married to power or wealth resources are at your disposer and it is advisable to use them to your advantage. And please do not misunderstand me, do not go to the extreme or do something that can get you in trouble. But note this she will refuse if your husband has already offered her something more valuable. It trust me i have been there and it sucks to know buy can get you everything.
I do not take this as a crime you only threatening to expose the bad thing she has done. This way can only be successful if your husband knows nothing about it and if he is the judgmental type and if not you are back to step zero. This was the only how i got get my husband to keep this business in check if you know what i mean.
My husband His womanizing behavior got him into a lot of trouble and if any of those stories where to hit the press it would have destroyed his life and this political career and probably landed him in jail. With all the advise form me and his advisories of his campaigning team it was still not enough to bring him to caution.
I went to the extreme to make sure he stops willingly or unwillingly that is i meant with some of his lover and asked to pay them off but they were not ready to let go it. I think he offered them something more that money that even with the amount i offered them, they all refused and believe me it was very surprising and they will turn down a large amount of money.
We my husband got to know about it he mad mad at me and gave all sort of threats. I was confused and his opposition were digging to find dirt on him and still was so convinced that they will not find anything but they did only with no evidence that was how lucky we were. Right then i took matters in my hand and contacted Obudun Magonata with the email address i saw on the internet i contacted him and told him what i want him to do for me to make my husband be faithful to me till our dying day and make all those people looking for how to bring down my husband stop.
OK note my husband is a very honest man who would not hurt a fly he was just careless and always picked the wrong kinds of woman that get him in trouble.
Obudun Magonata asked that i provide 4 kind of item me being so careful employed expert to help me get those materials mailed them over to him. I sent a total some of dollars when converting from Swedish Krona to American dollars. And it much much cheaper if i had asked him to get them for me. But whats done is done. Just after four day sent me a package, not telling its content but is totally harmless and told me how to make the spell effective.
I wish i knew this Great man all along my life would have been perfect. His campaign team did not understand how i did it and what i did they were just happy all the worse is past. What wow me the most about Obudun Magonata was that the told me the out come of the election before the election date last years because all this happened last year and just what he said will happen really came to pass.
You have nothing be be afraid you can trust him with anything Because all he does is help people no matter how hard it may be.. I started putting hankies in my sons and son in laws Christmas stocking along with lectures on why and when a gentleman needed to have that hankie in his pocket. The day we sat in the Doctors office preplanned by my son in law and I …….
He had listen and was by her side till the end. I am so sorry for your loss. It sounds like you have a tremendously loving, caring family. I Still believe in being a Gentlemen inlcluding open doors for a lady. It may old fashioned but im old fashoned still believe in manners. Remember the time that women were objects that needed special gestures done for them because they were forced to parade themselves in overly tight corsets to fit male beauty standards and were unable to make the same money as their male counterparts because they were closed off from the same educational opportunities and seen as less intelligent?
Remember the time gentlemen also stood closer to the street because they were considered expendable in terms of whether they died or not because you the object needs to be kept out of harms way.
Or when you had to ask another man if you could take his stuff cause his daughter was considered his stuff or part of his possessions. All these behaviors you long for were products of a time in society when women were barely considered human. Whether it is for a parent with an explosive temper or a three year old throwing the biggest temper tantrum, it is a perfect choice. Holly — Ilex Aquifolium. It allows for the expression of love, whether it is a healthy love of self or others.
It promotes compromise, patience, and gentility. It rids all strong negative feelings such as anger, rage, suspicion, envy, greed, or jealousy. It prevents intolerance, resentment, argumentativeness, aggression and more. Impatiens — Impatiens Glandulifera. Anytime there is impatience, restlessness, irritability, short lived temper blow ups, nervousness, road rage, when delays just about send one over the edge this is the indicated flower essence.
It helps restore inner peace, patience, relaxation, and soothes frustrations. Vervain — Verbena Officinalis. Anytime one is overly intense, high strung, irritable, frustrated, annoyed, slave driving, over achievers who are passionate about their work or causes, this is your flower essence.
Excessive drive and ambition can quickly become a convenient excuse for treating others badly. Click here for if you want to. Show Me Your Wife: Click Here and then click "Register". If your thread gets deleted please re-read the posting rules. Please read the posting rules before posting any message or picture. Post are archived three times daily and start each day with the last 25 posts of the day before-Become a paid member to never miss a post.
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