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O ne day, when my daughter, Ruby, was about 10 years old, I had a colossal argument with her about a pea. We were in Ikea in Brent Cross, north London.

We had ordered lunch in the Ikea restaurant. It involved something and peas. I had struggled to get Ruby to "eat normally" for as long as I could remember. She refused a wide variety of foods — most fruits, and most particularly any kind of green vegetable.

On this day, I'd just had enough. I was determined to make Ruby eat just one pea. It could be smothered in tomato ketchup.

It could be dipped in honey. I just wanted her to eat… the… fucking… pea. We spent half an hour discussing, arguing about and reasoning over that pea. I offered an absurd array of rewards. I don't remember what they were, but they were princely. Whatever she wanted she could have. If she would just eat that pea. Then I began to threaten punishments. She could see she had made me angry, and it was obvious I was going to get even angrier if she didn't Eat the Pea. After the Battle of the Pea, I reached a watershed.

I became a lot less fussed about what Ruby ate. I don't know if it made any difference. I don't recall any marked immediate improvement in her eating behaviour. But I suspect that my defeat was a good thing. Now she is 20, she has a very healthy attitude to food.

She doesn't worry about it. She loves steak tartare. She craves sushi and sashimi, she eats fruit, she'll try most things. She has no body issues and no food issues that I can see. She has glowing skin and hair, and is a healthy weight. She still doesn't eat peas. Or any other kind of green vegetable, including salad. Her explanation is straightforward: But then, why do we spend so much time trying to get our children to eat them?

And is it really, in the end, worth the candle? My suspicion is that all the effort, care and concern that many families expend to get their children to "eat healthy", may have no effect, or a bad effect.

We worry too much, and this worry has as much to do with social shame, social display and a need for control as it does with healthy eating.

We don't want our children to end up living on convenience foods, snacks and chips — partly because it is bad for them, but more pressingly, because it is bad for us. Because it is embarrassing. One night a week, they offered an amazing buffet. I sent the girls off to graze among the 50 or so amazingly varied and delicious platters of French and Asian food and charcuterie. They came back with chips, white bread and a bit of chicken. That time I wasn't even furious. I was just ashamed.

What was wrong with these kids that amid all this wonderful plenty, they opted for the crappiest dishes on the menu? I just thought they must be horribly spoilt. Perhaps this was unfair of me. But I do think many parents would feel the same. Yet it was just a meal. Why was I so upset? Perhaps the need for our children to eat healthy food is just a mask for a number of other anxieties.

We want to fit in with our neighbours. We want to be able to make the correct social signals to our peer group — "I am a good middle-class person, because my children eat a varied diet and healthy food". We are terrified our children might be overweight, which is now as much a social marker as a predictor of poor health. Nutritional science, however, is inexact. Why did Ruby grow up with clear skin, shining hair and a healthy attitude to food despite eating very little fruit and no green vegetables and a relatively limited diet through most of her childhood?

The human body is more complex and adaptable than we realise. The Kitava tribe of Papua New Guinea subsist on a diet that mainly consists of sweet potato, coconut and some fish. They are healthy, have good skin, strong teeth and suffer from virtually none of all the "diseases of civilisation". They don't eat any green vegetables. Greens are not a must-have. Nutrients found in green vegetables can easily be found elsewhere. It can use what resources it has available," says Charlotte Stirling-Reed of the Nutrition Society , an independent organisation that promotes and disseminates nutritional science.

As long as you are getting variety and the right amount of food every day you will be OK. If Ruby is eating well, every day, mainly healthy foods, she will be thriving. The anxieties and concerns and worries of the parents can rub off on their children and cause fussy eating. The psychotherapist Susie Orbach , author of Fat Is a Feminist Issue , makes a similar point about adults getting over-anxious about food and sees parental anxiety as a major contributor to disordered eating.

I told her that I used to get particularly upset if I spent a lot of time and effort preparing my children's food and they rejected it.

She sees such anxiety as centring on issues of control and rejection of the offerer of the food rather than the food itself. In other words, you're not getting upset when your child won't eat because it's not healthy. It's because you perceive the child as rejecting your love. And the whole framing of the issue around health and nutrition — food as "medicine" — is misguided.

We should just eat well when we are hungry. We need to be relaxed about it — like you pee when you need to.

When nourishment is labelled 'bad' or 'good', it becomes part of an emotional language and therefore problematic. I mentioned some of the spats I had had with Ruby over food — the Battle of the Pea, and other crude tactics, such as threatening no pudding if the main meal wasn't eaten. I would also sometimes say that if she didn't eat her dinner she would go to bed hungry.

It's just part of their development. Probably you will feel upset, but you must approach the issue in a neutral way. Don't lose your rag. The meal table should never be a site of conflict. You shouldn't make any threats around food. But then that wouldn't happen in my household.

I wouldn't make pudding a treat. I would offer the pudding during supper. I would let the child eat the pudding first if she wanted to. I wouldn't let them go to bed hungry. So many children won't eat at certain stages in their development, but then they change. I would give them pasta seven nights a week if necessary.

Both Orbach and Stirling-Reed point to the cultural factors over our difficulties and anxieties with food. In the part of Brittany where she moved to live with her family Le Billon is Canadian, her husband is French , the French food culture was incredibly strict. No snacking was tolerated. Proper table manners were insisted upon. If children wouldn't eat, they were left to go hungry. You ate together — either at school or with the family — at regular times, and you ate slowly.

Food is not seen as a pacifier, or an emotional distraction or a reward or a punishment. The subject of whether food is "healthy" or not barely arises. They don't, as Anglo-American cultures tend to, think of food to be parcelled out in indices of food groups, calories and nutrients. It is about enjoyment and variety. As a result, there were almost no fussy eaters in these traditional French communities.

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Aldrich Greek mythographer C2nd A. Each day an Eagle would fly to him and munch on the lobes of his liver, which would then grow back at night. Apollonius Rhodius, Argonautica 2. Rieu Greek epic C3rd B. The bird kept eagerly returning to its feed. They saw it in the afternoon flying high above the ship with a strident whirr. It was near the clouds, yet it made all their canvas quiver to its wings as it beat by. For its form was not that of an ordinary bird: Soon after the Eagle had passed, they heard Prometheus shriek in agony as it pecked at his liver.

The air rang with his screams till at length they saw the flesh-devouring bird fly back from the mountain by the same way as it came. Apollonius Rhodius, Argonautica 3. Callimachus, Fragment trans. Trypanis Greek poet C3rd B. Diodorus Siculus, Library of History 4. Oldfather Greek historian C1st B. But when Herakles saw him suffering such punishment because of the benefit which he had conferred upon men, he killed the eagle with an arrow.

Pausanias, Description of Greece 5. Jones Greek travelogue C2nd A. Prometheus still held by his chains, though Herakles has been raised up to him. For among the stories told about Herakles is one that he killed the eagle which tormented Prometheus in the Kaukasos Caucasus , and set free Prometheus himself from his chains. Quintus Smyrnaeus, Fall of Troy 5. Way Greek epic C4th A. Quintus Smyrnaeus, Fall of Troy 6. Arrow-smitten lay the Eagle of the Torment there beside.

Quintus Smyrnaeus, Fall of Troy Pseudo-Hyginus, Fabulae 31 trans. Grant Roman mythographer C2nd A. When it was killed, Prometheus after thirty thousand years was freed from Mount Caucasus. After 30, years Hercules killed this eagle and freed Prometheus. This arrow, they say, is one of the weapons of Hercules, with which he is said to have killed the Eagle which ate the liver of Prometheus.

Prometheus he [Zeus] bound with an iron chain to a mountain in Scythia named Caucasus for thirty thousand years, as Aeschylus, writer of tragedies, says. Then, too, he sent an Eagle to him to eat out his liver which was constantly renewed at night. Some have said that this eagle was born from Typhon and Echidna, other from Terra Earth [Gaia] and Tartarus, but many point out it was made by the hands of Vulcanus [Hephaistos Hephaestus ] and given life by Jove [Zeus].

But to come back to the beginning of the inquiry and the death of the eagle. Hercules, when sent by Eurystheus for the apples of the Hesperides, out of ignorance of the way came to Prometheus, who was bound on Mount Caucasus, as we have shown above. When victor, he returned to Prometheus to tell him that that Draco Dragon we have mentioned was slain, and to thank him for his kindness since he had pointed out the way. Straightway he gave what honour he could to the one that deserved it, for he killed the eagle and since it was slain, men began, when victims were sacrificed, to offer livers on the altars of the gods to satisfy them in place of the liver of Prometheus.

Fairclough Roman bucolic C1st B. The pudding turned out great! Could I double the recipe? Are you able to send me a photos of the vanilla wafers you use? This link should take you to several photos, Tineeka: I make mine in the microwave and it is so much easier because it will not scorch as fast.

Just be sure to stir about every 5 minutes or so. This may not be the best place to make this comment, but I have read all 92 comments and not a one mentions using this custard for making Homemade Ice Cream. My mother always used this recipe from scratch for her delicious banana pudding and this same recipe for the cooked custard for her homemade ice cream.

Of course, basically it is vanilla custard for vanilla ice cream, but you can add any flavoring you wish. My favorite is homemade peach when peaches are in season. Try it, you will love it!! This is very similar to what my mother used to make. I never knew exactly how she did it, but I loved to eat it while it was still warm. Thank you for sharing this. I never had this before,but now I have a very good chance of trying it. Here is the chocolate pie recipe, Regina: Chocolate Pudding for Pie 1 cup gran.

Combine all in sauce pan. Over medium heat, cook stirring constantly until thick. Butter and 2 tsp. Pour into baked pie crust. Cover hot pudding with meringue and brown in oven.

My mother made banana pudding often this way, and I used too. The filling is so delicious when made from scratch. I rarely make it now, but think I will get back to it!! Someone mentioned using pudding which is what you get most of the time at restaurants and pot luck dinners. This is the best!!! I have just started making it again, and my grandkids love it.

Why cant you just use instant banana pudding mix, or vanilla pudding mix instead? Would you have a receipe if i wanted to try the pudding mixes instead? Please let me know thanks! I am definitely going to make this pudding tomorrow! I was wondering if you might have any suggestions for using the yolks of all these eggs.

I also do mine a little diffrent I do not use flour I use 2 to 3 tablespoons of corn starch in the filling to make mine be or get it to thicken thats how my mom taught me and have never had a problem doing it that way but thats my way. Me too…good ole cornstarch pudding…creamier …makes great filling for cream puffs, too , without bananas!

My Mom used that same bowl to make banana pudding and Mac and Cheese — Brought a few memories to mind wishing I could sit at her table once again.

Do you eat this warm or cold? I would like to make this for school breakfast. You can eat it warm as soon as you make it or cold after it has been refrigerated. I like it both ways. Use instant banana pudding mix and one an one half cups of milk tastes great and no eggs enjoy dear. So glad to see a real banana puddin recipe. I grew up eatin this and my Momma made the best ever!

When we moved to Virginia, I was at a work function and everyone was raving over someones banana pudding so I went to get me a serving and it was jello pudding with nilla wafers. I have tried to recreate my Moms puddin recipe and she can tell me whats in it, but not how much.

She is a just till it looks right, type of cook. I finally found a recipe that is as close to hers as I can get. This is the BEST recipe for banana pudding that there is!

The way I have always made it, just like my Mama did. Pure joy and deliciously comforting to eat. My favorite dessert of all. I like the idea of the lemon juice for keeping the bananas from turning brown.

We really enjoy a good pan of banana pudding in our home, grandkids and all. I loved banana pudding as a kid and still do but I hated soggy vanilla wafers. Many, many years ago, when I was young my Mom would make this and leave part of one end with no wafers for me. No one else minded soggy wafters. Love banana pudding but hate the soggy vanilla wafers.

Have eaten one with crushed pineapple instead of banana. What liquid adjustment needed for this conversion? My mother would make tapioca pudding with pineapple and meringue. One of my favorites along with her banana pudding made like the recipe posted here for banana pudding.

Like Vanilla instead of Banana flavoring. I like the natural taste of the banana. I put a can of pineapple in a strainer and get as much juice out of it as possible. I just got back from the store and I am going to start working on it soon.

Thank you so much! My mother made it this way and granny too! Thank you so much Billy for all your comments. I am so happy I had this pudding recipe for you. I sent you a private message on your Facebook page thanking you for your kind comments today.

Well, no one else I knew served this dessert so I always thought it was her specialty. When Greg and I moved to Arkansas and were looking for a place to live we stopped at a chain restaurant called The Dixie Cafe for a quick bite. Then when we moved here, I realized it was quite popular and had to laugh at myself. My only complaint is that Greg dislikes bananas except in banana bread. Thanks for this post! Katherine, You will have to make it just for you and eat it all yourself.

Guess you could make two bowls and just put the pudding and the wafers in his bowl and you get the bananas in yours. I lost her recipe during moving her things and have searched for the recipe the most like hers!

Pineapple is good fixed like this! Do you think maybe I am still living in another generation because I love food that is prepared with love rather than pull out a box and whip up a meal? Loved your recipe…just like mine must be the KY in us. Margaret, This is the way my mother always made banana pudding.

Have a great weekend. Living in another generation is the best. I use boxes often but sure prefer homemade anytime. And we know whats in it went we make them. Margaret, it is the ky in us. Because I love thing made from scare then box myself. There is nothing like food made with love. Southern cooking is just plain good home cooking! This Old Fashioned Banana Pudding is a classic!

In a medium bowl, slice bananas and sprinkle with lemon juice to keep them from turning black. In a 2 quart casserole dish layer the vanilla wafers and bananas. I use 10 of the wafers to go around the side of the bowl just because I think it is pretty this way. In a saucepan on top of the stove with a whisk mix together the sugar, salt, flour, egg yolks, regular and evaporated milk.

Cook on medium heat, stirring continuously with whisk, about 7 or 8 minutes until thickens. It will burn very easily so be sure to stir Remove from stove and stir in vanilla flavoring. Pour over wafers and bananas. Beat egg whites on high until stiff and peaks form. Add sugar and vanilla and beat into egg whites. Spread over pudding and bake in degree oven until browned.

I have just put it under the broiler until it browns that way, too. July 8, at July 4, at December 22, at 9: Can I use half whole milk and half sweet condensed instead of evaporated milk?

The Southern Lady says: December 23, at 7: December 19, at December 20, at 9: November 22, at November 24, at 5: November 6, at June 23, at November 10, at 2: November 10, at 3: June 23, at 2: June 23, at 5: So happy to hear that Malissa. Thank you for letting me know and happy it worked for you. June 21, at June 22, at 9: You evidently did not cook it long enough or high enough to thicken it enough to set up,Malissa. June 20, at June 20, at 1: April 17, at 4: Will the meringue be ok in the refrigerator over night after its browned?

I keep this in the fridge for several days once it is made with the merinque. April 17, at 3: September 17, at 1: April 4, at 3: April 4, at 6: March 29, at 7: March 1, at I love this recipe, have made it several times… My kids favorite dessert! January 8, at 4: January 3, at 4: January 3, at 5:

But your diet plays a role too, and can help or hamper not only the health likely to experience ovulatory infertility, while women who ate two or. "According to Food Standards Australia New Zealand, we eat on average around 8, It's only an estimate and is not meant to be applied to the individual person. Here's what 2, calories of food look like in one day for a range of different diets. . Why Women Feel More Hungry Around Their Period. year-old hasn't eaten sugar for 28 years, looks incredible And today, the year-old has a body most women half her age would kill for – which she puts it down to following a no-sugar diet. when I had a cancer removed from my nose when I was only ' Want to become your own nutritionist?.