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Fellas, if you're in your 50s, single and dating and feeling like you're not getting anywhere , consider this a little friendly feedback from the ladies. Maybe you've heard it all before, maybe it doesn't apply to you, maybe you've got the dating thing down -- it doesn't matter.
When it comes to women and dating, I say you can never know enough. And women, lest you think you're off the hook, you're not. Even though I'm talking to the guys here, many of these points apply to you too. Dating in midlife isn't always easy, but at least you're all in it together, and you can all make it great. So men, before you break out into a cold sweat, know that all this is well intended and researched. I've gathered input from three of my most trusted single girlfriends whose ages range from early 40s to lates.
They're smart, sane, and they're here to help. And so am I. Since I got married for the first time at 51, I can speak from experience when it comes to dating men in their 50s. Maybe you're lonely, horny, you want a girlfriend, need some company, or just need to get laid. Who can blame you? We ALL want love, but some guys blow it by rushing. To me, that's a turn-off. If you don't sleep with them fast enough, they get frustrated and lose interest.
Don't get too flirty too fast, don't text, and definitely don't sext. Even if you're fresh out of a miserable marriage and new to the singles scene, take a breath. You can be romantic and take the lead, but exercise patience. Guys that are too fast getting in are probably going to be too fast getting out.
Chivalry and romance aren't dead -- in fact, they're alive and well and much appreciated. So take your time getting to know your date; ask questions, be curious. And when you've accrued a decent amount of courtship hours, then you can bang away. In other words, you're furious. We get your circumstances might suck, but don't let it consume you. Don't let your anger turn into emotional baggage you carry around everywhere you go.
You can prepare a lovely Italian meal for a guy, and all of a sudden he brings up the fact his ex made the best lasagna of all time. They talk about how awful their ex-wives are, and how much money they had to give them.
Dump the baggage, dude. Stop talking about your ex, your kids, your money, etc. If you're still that angry and wounded, get help. Some therapy, meditation, or a little alone time wouldn't be the worst thing in the world for you. The point is, hold back from dating until you're healed. Listening and wanting to know everything about her earns you major points.
Let go of your fear and allow yourself to love again. Despite the occasional dating disasters and mating missteps, there's a lot to love about you guys. You're older and wiser, smarter and sexier than you were in your younger days.
Plus, your experience and maturity give you more depth and better perspective in life. I say it's time to use it to your advantage. Tap here to turn on desktop notifications to get the news sent straight to you. We love you guys and want the best for you, so here goes. Chicks dig fellas in their 50s. We're rooting for you men, so go get 'em just don't go too fast.
Follow Treva Brandon on Twitter: Writer, fitness professional, dating expert, imparting wit and wisdom about life and late blooming love at www. Go to mobile site.
Thanks to smartphone apps, seeking and finding fast hot casual sex has become, much like real estate, all about location. The more sizable and interesting the nearby crowd, the better your shot at finding partners. As such, any jam-packed venue is now a prime cruising spot for app-aware people looking to get laid. This entire genre of apps has in effect turned your local dog park, museum, mall, and crowded train station into a gigantic "singles" bar though not everyone is single.
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