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Let's work together to keep the conversation civil. Rent wife for Rs 8, a month in Gujarat. People in tribal belts of Gujarat have smelt an irresistible opportunity in the skewed sex ratio in the state. You might have heard of rent-a-womb, but who ever heard of rent-a-wife! Certain people, especially in tribal belts of Gujarat, have smelt an irresistible business opportunity in the skewed sex ratio in the state.
If many tribal daughters are being sold in marriage, there are also reports of husbands agreeing to their wives staying with higher caste men, who are not able to find a wife in their own community, for a monthly rental. Many "middlemen" operate in the tribal heartland to supply tribal girls for Rs and Rs 60,, depending on how poor and desperate the girl's family is.
With the demand being high, a committed agent easily makes Rs 1. Read Post a comment. Login from existing account Facebook Google Email. Share on Facebook Share on Twitter. All Comments Your Activity. We have sent you a verification email. To verify, just follow the link in the message. Trending Videos Ilaiyaraja sings 'Janani Janani' song Vishal Mishra in Lucknow Shashi Tharoor refuses to apologise Ruckus after OFDC exam cancelled at last minute Featured Today In Travel.
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It adds a lot to rational discourse. Arial, if you go back to work, maybe your critical thinking skill will improve. This writer wrote very clearly that the case example was a woman who refused to go to work after the children were school age. I cannot express how theraputic your site has been for me. It is so helpful knowing that not only are there so many others in my situation but also that there is someone who clearly knows what we have lived through.
I have found that the events I have endured are near impossible for people looking in to believe. If you can think of something that would ruin a marriage I have lived it. I lived with a master manipulator who controlled me with threats of taking my kids knowing the courts would always side with her claims and victim scenarios.
I was paralized with the fear of divorcing and leaving my children in an abusive situation with a woman who at a minimum would destroy them psychologically and at worst could end their lives. I was not willing to take the chance in our slanted courts who always favor the mother especially if the dad is a Servicemember. I decided to stay no matter the cost to me. I had to save my kids. No one believed how bad it was and in our cirlces she was better than the perfect mom, professional, and wife.
She was flawless on the outside. To those closest me and kids she was Evil incarnate. Long story short, once bitten twice shy I began taping audio of phone conversations of the rage, drunkeness,etc.. It was a repeat performance of the earlier incident that she was able to remove my children with. The difference this time was the tape. Not knowing the incident was recorded the night culminated with her being arrested for domestic assault.
Upon bail she filed a DVP against me with claims of physical abuse of her and the children just like she had done previously. It had worked flawlessly once surely it would this time as well. She even brought pictures of injuries to court to prove I assaulted her injuries she caused by falling drunk on a gravel road. Although the judge ruled she caused her own injuries did she hold her liable for the false allegation of abuse? She then filed for emergency custody of the children she had assaulted.
I produced the tape. I got sole temp custody of the children. The children, one of whom ran away that evening seeking help came out with everything they had endured to 3rd party court appointed investigators.
It has been 8 months now and she has been allowed to see the children 1 hour a week. Guardian ad Litem investigated and has recommended no unsupervised visits until majority age. Childrens counselor agrees as does DHS. Psychological evaluations diagnosed her axis 1 alcohol abuse. So you think kids and I would be safe at this point.
The Forensic pscychologist report although diagnosing her with BPD threw a wrench at me. So now I have become the target. He never once mentioned the affect her disorder had on us. In fact he exonerated her by giving her wiggle room out of responsibility for her actions. Give a Borderline any way to blame or shuck responsibility and they will maximize it. The shrink really screwed this up and obviously is not schooled on thet true aspects of this illness. I was dinged for being paranoid. I fully admit it.
Not only are military pilots trained that way but I lived with a BPD for 15 years and had no idea what I was up against. It was predictable unpredicatablility. I always knew something bad was coming I just never knew what or when.
Hypervigilance is an understatement. I was paralized in fear. I could not stay in it and remain sane and I could not get out leaving my children to fend for themselves. Imagine calling from Iraq to find your wife driving home drunk with your small children in the car!! My attorney this past week withdrew under pressure. I warned her early on that she had never been up against a Bordeline of this magnitude. She did not believe me. I am now broke 3 years from retirement and had to hire a very expensive yet skilled attorney not familiar with BPD I will eventually go public hopefully with these tapes I have.
They are a clear representaion of Borderline pscyhosis. Remarkably even with the tapes responsibility is projected. I remain in a battle of epic proportions to save my kids even with mountains of solid evidence and reports. To which my answer always is. I taped because no one believed me or even had the capacity to. As evidence, even with the tapes I am not believed and she still comes out as the victim. Look at what I am having to go through to free myself and the kids despite all evidence.
With borderlines tapes are your only hope. Otherwise what they do is impossible to relay. I would love any advice and would love to hook you up with my new lawyer. I feel so sorry for you. It sounds like the people assessing your crazy wife are more crazy than her to even let her near her children ever again!! Dont give up and hope these crackpot professionals finally see the truth for you. Lots of people must be in your shoes, women can be total lying bitches and dangerous aswell.
I think the way this works is that the local, state and federal governments do not want to have to use tax dollars to support the kids or the ex-wives so they create a situation in which it is cheaper for the man to keep the family together, no matter what.
It is a lifelong trajectory in which a woman will do anything so long as she can justify in her mind that some man was responsible for it. The majority of men have no idea of just how bad many women are, if they did know, few men would ever roll the dice and get married.
I know women too well to ever marry one. The bitter irony is, my mother and sisters have carried out and perpetrated a lot of the hateful, undermining, belittling and controlling behaviors most men experience from their girlfriends and wives.
My moods were actually being monitored and kept in check! They took advantage of the fact that they had proximity to me, by reason of the fact that we are of the same family, to make my life hell!
Coldly, calculatedly, underhandedly, covertly, but also abruptly and in your face. Each one had her own approach towards bringing me down, trying to destroy my work life, reputation, peace of mind and tranquilty. One of them even went so far as to repeatedly state that she was trying to drive me to suicide.
They are all unhappy in their own lives, but what in the hell does that have to do with me?!!! At no time did she tell the judge that every word of her complaint was false. She tried playing the virtuous victim. Not only could the judges see right through her but, interestingly enough, every single woman in the court rclearly ecognized the game she was trying to run on me.
Which tells you how commonly known these tactics are among women. An interesting study that claims most working women are actually less happy then they were 30 years ago. You know why Women are less happy? Ever see a woman marry a nice man and destroy him? My wife is incredibly capable of working- can make nearly as much money as I do shes an R.
I take offense to the notion that I, as a woman, must be some insatiable harpy, lol. I have three kids, and I work and have worked since day one, in some capacity. I work for an indie publisher, which thankfully gives me the option of telecommuting, and I freelance as much as I can. My husband is constantly trying to get me to stop working and stay home. My point is that not every working woman is unhappy.
I love what I do and I as much as I love my kids, and treasure the time I get to spend with them due to my flexible job, I also look forward to the day they are both in school full time and I can go back to the office everyday. I have short and sweet advice for most of you guys. It wont make an ounce of difference if a women works or doesnt work if she is mental or does not love you anymore.
Its not like women who do not work have the majority on psycho. The truth is your choice in a mate was probably just a poor choice for you. You need a working women and thats fine,and her trying to make you take care of her when you dont want to is wrong! Once this ideal has been ingrained on either side its hard to reverse. But that goes for men and women!! Since you seem to have taken the liberty to dispense some free advice, allow me to return the favor:. They say one thing I want to work…..
You state the obvious when saying that people should figure this stuff out before marriage. Of course they should and bad decisions are made all the time by those who do not want to see the light but that is a topic for another website.
There are plenty of women out there who want to sink their hooks into a man and not work. Frankly, I have trouble respecting a women who does not want to work and be independent. If you have a SAHM and a husband who works, the courts fail to consider that the husband also contributed to housework and raising the childrens. The court assumes by rewarding the SAHM half that the husband worked, came home, and did nothing. Since when can it be assumed that the husband just works and comes home, offering nothing to child-rearing once he is home?
Maybe the working spouse should get two thirds of the assets for working and contributing to the household upon the divorce while the SAHM gets one-third for staying at home.
I am a big fan of feminism…. I wish my husband was as supportive of my career as you seem to be. A warning to you: My first piece of advice would be to prep for a divorce quietly, secure your assets, then cut her off and see what happens. My second piece advice would be to realize that the loss of portfolio assets, etc. You can rebuild, and frankly, these women require so much overhead and create so much stress that you will find out again how little you need to live happily!
Your children are old enough to be only minimally affected by any fallout. My third piece of advice: You are not crazy! What your wife expects and demands is unfair, spoiled, childish, and classic NPD behavior. There are plenty of hard working, appreciative women out there, you just have to find one.
Hi 52 and tired, Please leave this horrible woman she is a drain on you as a normal person and doesnt love you. Anyone who loved you properly would want your happiness she is only bothered about her own. Selfish and childish is what that truth is about her. It doesnt take phsycolologist to work that one out.
Dependent and childish behaviour. I felt disturbed enough about the topic to find my way here. I am not going to kill myself trying to take care of all this by myself. I feel like in my case that this is a attempt for my wife to become more lazy and self centered. Not to offend anyone but I thought that this was a sight for men to express thereselves about this matter. I hear my fiance point of view on this matter enough and am frankly not intrested I tried to listen with a open mind but noe I feel like this whole ordeal is one big mistake I can do well by myself.
I can be happy by myself. I am not going to encourage the lazy wife sex. She likes lobster and Gucci Louis Vouton. I am about to call the wedding off and save my money for for something that makes sense. I think this mind set has been pre-decided. To void divorce and debt and unhappiness I am going to cut it off before it starts. I was laid off from a well paying marketing job in , my wife is a teacher…makes a good salary. When I was laid off in was my youngest son was diagnosed with autism at 2 yrs.
I also have another son who is presently 11 years old. Since I was laid off from a highly competitive industry I chose to switch careers and become a teacher. While my wife worked, I went to school days, nights, studied weekends was the primary caregiver for both my children, including but not limited to therapies for our autistic son, maintained the household, cleaning, inside and out,laundry, car maintenance.
That was my job. Knowing my wife wished she were home with our sons I tried to make it as easy as possible for her. Helped her get out the door in the morning, helped her with reports. I wanted to provide my sons, especially our autistic son with an emotional foundation that he would carry with him for the rest of his life.
This is my gift to him which you cannot put a price on. I will go to my grave knowing I did the best I did for my sons. What did a get from my wife.. I might add…in doing so I received my teaching certification, presently working at a Hilton Hotel full time for the past two years to help with the bills.
I am stressed about money, feeling I am spinning my wheels. I am pretty bored most of the time, doing little but working, then sitting around at home — I drink more, I guess to escape, to go a little numb. I want to go do things, but feel guilty doing them on my own.
Most of my decisions are based on what I think my wife wants me to do. Often, these are in conflict with what I want to do… so I end up doing nothing.
My wife has basically retired at age She has worked less than 4 years in our marriage, while I have worked over 22 so far, often having multiple jobs at one time. She makes me feel cheap, and incompetent in my earning ability.
She complains I control the money, but she spends what she wants. She is the only woman in our families to act like this …. Not working and not really helping out. She cooks rarely, and then mostly unhealthy stuff late at night. We are forced to like it or do it ourselves. She washes my clothes very inconsistently. I feel very sad when guys at work show up with packed lunches and ironed clothes.
I am very tired most of the time. I just want to sleep, to hide and do nothing. I feel burnt out, just barely going. This will be my fault. I used to do more. I went and walked or ran every night. I hiked in the mountains every weekend. I cooked pretty good food. I lifted weights or did martial arts pretty regularly. I had my clothes ready to go every weekend. My house was clean. I read a lot, had relaxing mornings, and evenings. I was exploring the area I lived, learning Spanish, taking short class things like real estate, walking around museums and stuff, volunteering with SUK.
Now, I just pass the day until the next one comes around. So again, why do I feel sad? She states that we can climb mountains, go hiking, and she threw in a few other things that I like to do that she says we can do together.
This was a stab …. Another guilt thrown at me when she was talking to our oldest daughter about us not shopping together. This is a very consistent pattern, why would I want to put myself in this position. I only do not want to go shopping; she makes me feel unimportant and stupid when I have gone in the past. So, what is the answer? I guess to focus on what I have, which is quite a lot. But, I have no more today than I had last year, so what is the difference?
Am I growing, or dying? So, how do I get out from under the guilt that my wife gives me? How do become a man? How do I become happy? She sounds like a spoilt child and needs to grow up. Be the adult and leave her and find a nice grown up woman they do exist. Do it now it will change your life forever.
I totally can relate to all of this. I hope that you have left her. This sounds like she is making you feel depressed and is ruining your life.
This is very unhealthy and it sounds like she is drowning you. You have fallen out of love with her. The only time I spent that much money in that short a period of time was when I paid tuition bills in college.
And that was money from my savings, before I even met my husband! The thought of wasting that kind of cash makes me a little ill. Caleb, I feel so sorry for you. Maybe these people assessing your wife are just as crazy as her!? Sounds like she needs locking away from everyone for the publics safety? Why arent the authorities doing it? Because a lot of people are very manipulating and people believe them and some find it funny not in this case I hope.
Not all medical professionals are perfect and obviously not in your case. Hope you get a better life soon you deserve it like everyone else. Hi finally woken, At last you are free to meet an independent lady. Forget the parasite you had recently. The childish women are the ones who need support and make out that women like me dont exist probably. They also stay with a man they dont love until they run off with another man to support them.
Then complains that I never do anything around the house. I work 2 jobs I leave the house at 7: She has 2 BS degrees in science and a masters in hospital admin. Know how long she has worked in her entire life? Hi Already lost, Dont think you would lose much if you dumped her tomorrow! Let her but without you! What do you do when your future spouse says that she wants to work and pretends to find a job and lives with you and finds every excuse not to work. She has to be lazy and doesnt really want to work and is just using you for your money.
You need to find a more ambitious type of women who has a goel and purpose in life. What do women think about this situation? The feeling of contribution, achievement and success is rewarding. I love working-my salary is small, but i still feel confident and i do my best at work. One thing that needs to be made very clear is the difference between having one of a couple stay home when the kids are little, but when they get to Junior High School, there are no excuses except what Dr.
When my wife and I married, we agreed that she would stay home until our youngest was in first grade and then finish her college degree. Our youngest got to first grade and my wife changed her mind. Jason, I feel really sorry for you. My husband made derogatory comments that even though I had always earned much more than him! I find women who could never be independent such as women who dont have good jobs spread stupid childish rumours I cant cope on my own!? So you see the problem is difficult.
A lot of women say they are independent and can do things on their own BUT big BUT they are totally delusional because women like me make them feel threatened. The conclusion is sorry for waffling! I am now remarried and in the throes of us financially coming together over the next year.
Take care and good luck. I have never looked to a man to support me, in fact my first husband made significantly less than me as a dog walker, and he stayed home with our daughter while I worked and went to college. It confounds me that there are still women out there who are happy to sap the life out of a man like this! I read this article with much interest. Relationships are a two way street and complacency, dependency and laziness soon breed resentment.
I would imagine it also leads to feelings of worthlessness in the wives. How can they possibly be happy living like that? The women in these situations have got to sense the resentment their husbands are feeling. Add in other problems… lack of intimacy, controlling behavior, etc and you have a recipe for a miserable marriage. I am also fully aware men need to put effort into a relationship to encourage their wives to be the best they can be and remind them every day of how much they love them.
I work full time, raised a child, did the household chores, managed all the finances…. He would not have me any other way and I would never allow myself to become any less than that.
Just my two cents. Long time listener, first time caller. Been dealing with these issues for years, your website is great, helps me keep myself on track when I start getting dragged off to crazy town again.
Anyway, the reason for my comment: My personal experience is that my wife does not regard work as a means to a paycheck to help take care of herself or her family. What she wants out of her work is an ego hit and leverage. She will gladly work at a job or business which is a net cost to the family so long as it gives her a facial claim to some prestige and she can use it as an excuse to require this or that behavior of me. Now everybody has to decide their own limits and what they can live with.
The bottom line is that if I push her to go to work, it will just cost me more in the end. Or ask for her to do anything around the house. Nothing you say or do is going to help. She is simply going to be the way she is, and anything you say or do will be used to show how bad you are.
So it is what it is. Just my two cents of experience in case anyone here can benefit from it. Saved me the time of explaining the double blade cut of life with her. And, shocking how closely it parallels my life…. My kids are 24 getting married in a month , 21 and going out on his own, and 11…. Like she read my mind! Every time she did go out and get a job; it lasted only a couple weeks to months.
And it cost me more to buy the work clothes than the pay she ever earned. I too run a business on top of being a professional pilot for 25 years. Plus, explaining rudimentary accounting items over and over again is a waste of my day. It is way cheaper for now and I have unfettered time with my kids to allow them to be who God intended them to be.
Since I am being promoted within the company and my role changes while moving into senior management …. I encourage all of you to above it if you can.
Truly, a rock and a hard place…. Hi Bob, Feel really sorry for you. No contribution to you whatsoever!! Love is a partnership not a dependancy. She is a child and needs to be treated like one. This is exactly what is going on in my house…. We got married 7 years ago and it is affecting our relationship to the point that I almost see her as my 3rd child instead of my wife.
My ex wanted to get back with me and I agreed under certain conditions. The most important condition was to get a job and be financially independent. I told her not to worry about rent and groceries until she gets a new job.
Probably 2 big mistake. Now it is 6 months after her layoff and she still has not found a job. She has not asked for money to make car payments yet so she must have saved a little while she was working. Hell, I do that everyday! Let her be independant for 2 years to prove to you she is grown up! Take care and be strong. A lovely grown up lady deserves and can cope with a baby!
They are very demanding! Like your partner by the sounds of it! Learn your earlier lesson well and dont cave in. Wish you lots of luck!! I have been married for 13 years, with my wife working the whole time as a scientist.
But after losing her job due to bad changes in supervision at her workplace, she quit. She kept applying for jobs, and even tried a couple, but at every job she says someone is mean to her or expects too much.
On top of all this, her mother died a few months ago after a lengthy battle with cancer. I own a heating and air conditioning business, and I stay so busy and stressed doing it. She keeps talking now about just getting a part time job. I feel like my wife is bailing on me, leaving it up to me alone to finish the plan we started together.
And I really feel bad telling her to keep a job because of her mom recently passing. Am I wrong for feeling this way? We have a 9 months old little boy and my wife is currently on maternity leave but is now no longer getting any sort of income from her employer as she is 9months into her leave. She is due to go back to work mid July as she had decided she wanted a full 12 months off.
Incidentally — this money I have saved is due to savings I have made on our mortgage. We ended our fixed rate period and switched to a tracker 1. Luckily she got a good manager just before she left on maternity and HR were horrified when they saw what she was earning and quickly put through her increase. We had been fighting to get this done for the best part of a year and it used a lot of energy and time in writing letters and emails etc….
I have suggested due to this she should go back to work early so she can save up 3 months wages to support us and make things a little easier. She refuses point blank! So our household income has halved all of a sudden and on top of all of this she wants to move house as well! Did I tell you she has just bought a car? And on top of that I bought myself a new family wagon to accommodate 2 kids.
Then she lands it on me — I aint going back to work!!! If we could swap roles and I became a stay at home dad I would make sure I managed my time accordingly and had stuff ready when she got home from work. Good luck people — be strong…. We have two young men 17 and 15 and for our entire marraige my Wife has not worked a day after she fgraduated with honors as a science teacher. My truth is the only choices I have had are whether to take the local roads or highway to work every day.
One day when the children were young, my Wife broke down in tears when I was walking through the door after a long day and informed me that she was so busy she did not have time to change her sanitary napkin.
She was tired, I get it, but projecting blame that I was somehow responsible for missing a few bathroom breaks was stunning. Cell phone calls during dinner. Text messages while driving. Anyway, we have been looking into private schoold for the boys, and thinking about upcoming college. I have devloped my own coping skills. If you are married over 10 years and your wife never worked, she gets alimony for life and half of everything. Chris, What a difficult situation. If you dont really put a handle on your obviously selfish partner you by the looks of it are going to have very little respect and eventually little love for you partner.
She doesnt care about your physical or mental health by the sounds of it! You are her key to never working ever again. Getting pregnant again is a symptom that she cant act as a responsible adult who can discuss important issues with her partner which affect him both financially and emotionally. Deluded also that what she is doing has nothing to do with her financially contributing as an adult should.
I sympathise with you entirely but unfortunateley lots of women act like this manipulating a situation they cant rationally discuss. Not being adult again. Proof also was her not getting paid what she deserved. Couldnt negotiate that either. It must have dimly lit budoirs alongside soft and mushy pillows. I can imagine the passion it invokes.
Still a lot of tenderness though. But the next morning through the rest of our honeymoon, boy, did we make up for it! In my life I never thought there is such thing as spiritual intercession. My problem started nine months back when the father of my kids started putting up some strange behavior; I never knew he was having an affair outside our matrimonial home.
No w we are living happily and I still do contact him on this email: I recently started taking fish pills, and they helped with my acne a lot! I also use the tea tree oil face wash from body shop , along with the seaweed toner. I'm a vegetarian and eat a lot of vegetables, and I eat pretty healthy. I really like it when individuals come together and share opinions. Great blog, stick with it!
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One of the Main Things is that to understand each other and try to make her feel comfortable with you first. Talk with her , make her laugh , do small naughty things and than go ahead if you body isn't tired to much.
Either you can just cuddle and sleep. Thanks to make such a cool post which is really well written. I'm glad those words spoke to you. I feel very strongly about that. We all have "thoughts" but it's those other thoughts that keep me going and let me know what my heart is speaking….
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A life insurance policy eventhough it mustn't be is asap a genuinely controversial worry. There definitely seems to be a substantial amount various sorts of life insurance plan available, but you can find really only two varieties. Term Coverage is true insurance. It precautions you for the certain interval. Whether you have to mentally schedule sexy nights, or buy a few more pretty pieces from the lingerie section, try this week to take a couple of steps towards initiating sex more with your spouse if this is, indeed, something you struggle with.
If not, then rock on! Has your husband ever told you what he appreciates most about having you for a wife? Leave your comments below and share with a wifey or wifey-to-be friend! Your email address will not be published. I agree with every point you made. Both myself and my husband do these five things for each other whenever possible.
The best compliment I have evet received is when he told me that I have the kindest, purest, most beautiful heart he has come across. I melted when ge said that.
That best friend part is so true. Having someone who really supports you is key. Being on their team.
This is a great post. I am so guilty of thinking men are just empty headed lugs who only think about beer, sex, food and football sometimes LOL.
You have some of the best ideas about marriage and relationships. I love your take on the five things men want most in a wife, but I am curious, did you ask your husband? Love your article Chelsea. Someone to have FUN with.
Where does laughter and playful, easy fun go after marriage? Life is serious enough. If you go back up to the top of the article you will see that she says these might be more of what they need than what they actually want.
Also, she is a female writer, but regardless of that, each one is true in most relationships. Not true my husband and I discuss this stuff all the time. This list is very accurate. I asked my husband why he felt he wanted to marry me after he proposed, just to know, and he stated all of the above.
It came from him not me. And if we need to talk we will. But, what do you do when talking about your feelings is a no no? That is the problem in my 33 year marriage. Talking is bad, just sweep it under the rug and forget about it. As a man, mans man even, these five things are in my opinion completely dead on. Sometimes men are just so different from women it is so hard to figure them out! I would agree, these are what men want in general. Like us, they need someone who guides and supports them and calls them out when needed.
I will agree with that comment but its starts as kids when a little girl falls they get affection and comforted. I like to think my husband sees all of these things in me and more. Word on the Chris Hemsworth. The cheerleader is actually one of the most important ones!
Everyone needs encouragement and a cheerleader especially when they are struggling. I think women forget that men are different animals. They place more importance on the physical side than women. You are so right. Physical intimacy provides reassurance that my wife still finds me attractive and loves being with me. It is not about sex. It is about experience a passionate and intimate moment where you are becoming one.
It is a tremendous form of connection, emotionally. A cheerleader for sure! My Husband always turns to me for that extra push. I totally agree with this. You are right about all these points. Sometimes we get too busy working and taking care of our family that we forget these things. These points are all true. Very open and honest. I have found for my husband the key thing is respect.
The more respect I give him, the more he blooms. I don;t know that my husband would feel the need to have me be all these things though. I think these are definitely good qualities to look for in a significant other or spouse. I know at least, for me, having someone that I can trust explicitly is important.
Omg so agree with this list!!!!! All guys really want is someone to chill with lol…. I love what you say about the cheerleader. I think we can sometimes forget how much they need it.
I think that is so important! Your words provide needed encouragement! These are all great things, and I think any relationship can benefit from the reminders. These are great things to think about in a relationship.
Good for you for putting this much thought into this and sharing with others! I believe a husband wants to feel like he is still you knight is shinning armour, your protector. Allow your husband to feel proud that he is a provider for his family and he is needed.
We all like to feel important in our lives. Opening a bottle of ketchup or changing the tire on the car, it all ads up to being needed, wanted and loved. My husband and I have been together 10 years and married for almost 6 and things have been rough but there has never been a time that I have been number 1 … I have put everything aside for him and our son and it seems to just not matter. This post is about what men need in a wife, but she says in almost every point that women need these things from your spouse too.
You should both value and support each other equally. You probably need to talk to him. You should let him know. I just decided to become a communications major, and one of the things we learn is that sometimes we just need to speak up in a kind way, not pointing fingers and let him know. You should also both take the love language test. I dealt with this for YEAS. We were best friends, but more platonic. Affectionate, but not sexual.
He was unable and I felt like a repulsive failure. It was the demise of our year marriage. So you dumped him because his sex drive did not match yours?? Destroy a marriage of 28 years because not enough sex… How selfish is that? Maybe he had some health problems that needed addressed.
Wow I am so sick of this scenario… Marriage is suppose to be a lifetime commitment. Now if you said he beat you, verbally abused you, I could understand. Now it is old and does not work the way you expect it too anymore… So throw it away and get a new one. We are talking about a human being here…. If one cannot connect with their partner on an intimate, visceral level over the course of 28 years, it would begin to impact your self-esteem. I agree with you about Debra. Sounds like she was just assuming and being mean to her.
But like I said, we all have needs, some different than others, and with some people, things just cannot be worked out. Have a nice day. Debra, how do you know who ended the marriage? You are just assuming it was her, and being mean to her.
It could have been him, or been a mutual decision. And you mention abuse. And we all have needs. Some have different needs than others. And not all things can be worked out. Some people are very difficult to work things out with. Be nicer to people. How does one respond to that?! As I read the posts coming from women, on a nutshell, we are very basic creatures…. Being non — judgemental also works……. I find myself being drawn to women who understands this premise…..
I just stumbled upon this blog and love it — especially this post. I love knowing that other women love their husbands the way I do. He truly is my best friend and I hate being away from him EVER… Sometimes life gets busy and stressful though and this was a good reminder of what really matters…. They are very wellsaid. I totally agree with them. When we do that, you are mirrored by your husband and the relationship is mutually caredfor both partners!!
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