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You did this a couple of times - quit for a few months, and started again when you found something to blame it on. I remember one time I said something about me going to AL-Anon and you came unglued. You told me you weren't an alcoholic, that you could quit when ever you wanted and that if I went to AL-Anon, we were done. Then you started criticizing every little thing that I did, so I started going to therapy to deal with your outbursts and your verbal and mental abuse.
It finally just got to be too much for me to bear, and since you just got angry when I tried to talk to you, I gathered up my courage and what little was left of my self-esteem and left. It's been 9 long months now, and there's not a day that goes by that I don't think of you, miss you, wonder how you are, and wish things could have been different.
I still love you with every fiber of my being I still have voicemails that you left me, telling me how much you love me, how I was your best friend, partner, lover, and family.
I've had some of them for over a year, and I listen to them often. Every time I do, I cry for the loss of US, and the loss of what could have been. I still wear the ring that I promised myself to you with, even though it was just a ring that I had and nothing you had given me. When I told you about it, you were so happy and promised me that you would get me one just as soon as you could, but in the almost 3 years we lived together, you never did.
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