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Don t miss the opportunity of a lifetime bdsm

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If you hate it, if it feels wrong, if you feel dirty or betrayed or like you have to force yourself into something:. There are dozens of reasons why people make themselves try to be okay with poly. Maybe her partner tried monogamy for her and was unhappy. Maybe they saw it as a way to try to stay together. These things all look so loving and noble. The healthiest of people have down times and the best relationships do, too. Nothing could be further from the truth.

People and relationships are not commodities. Relationships are forever and always about individuals humans and the different ways we merge and change and bump against each other. I do not believe that there is any great value in white-knuckling it through a romantic relationship. Suck it up and deal to make sure the kids are properly taken care of and nurtured?

Go for it and enjoy. It can and does happen. You Still Have to Choose. If both partners want to remain involved romantically, but are not suited to long-term primary relationships, sometimes secondary-style situations work better. We fight, we argue, we butt heads on everything. But as a secondary level relationship? We have great success. Mixed orientation relationships can work, but that a lot of work on the emotional state of things. As I got out of my marriage with my just out gay husband, I decided to give poly a try.

I was curled up in a ball every time my poly partner was with his other partner for the 9 months we were together; not crying but angry, anxious and nauseous. I really wanted to be poly but just am not. Breaking up was super painful since I still loved him. I feel betrayed and alone and very stupid. I am right there with you. I am mono and been married for 7 years this coming Sunday, been with him for 11 years and he told me last week he finally figured out why he feels different and has different view….

I read some stuff he wanted me to read. He has told me he loves me and wants to continue to be with me but also wants someone else…he said he can love someone else too…. I was stunned because, after 16 years of marriage, I never saw it coming. During those discussions, before her revelation, I had told her that I see nothing wrong with polyamory.

What consenting adults choose to do, is their own business as long as no one is hurt. Looking back, I wish I had been much clearer than I thought I was. Things got really bad. Lost 24 lbs, and found myself in therapy. As much as I hated to do it, I had to give the ultimatum. She said that she loved me more, so I — unfortunately — had to make her prove it. She agreed to do it. A few hiccups early on, but she now seems unfazed by doing that. I keep being told not to focus on those aspects, but easier said than done.

My wife and I had been together for about 4 years and we have a 2 year old. I knew my wife was poly in one way or another ever since we started dating but I was too naive or unaware to really grasp what it means to me and to our relationship. I have enjoyed the benefits of the open relationship aspect of poly myself: I would be honest about the meetings and sometimes we would even discuss about the content of the dates — life was fun and easy.

For my wife poly is not about casual sex as she desires an emotional connection which she has found in a few people that suddenly came into the picture shortly after we made the decision to go poly. My wife is very honest and open and truly ethical: The main issue that bothered me was the overlap between the relationships: It feels like our time together can be interrupted, at any given moment, by a potential partner.

I am better now at not asking for so many details and dealing with my anxiety on my own without dumping it on my wife every time a trigger, as the above, is presented.

I really want to be poly and happy for me and for my wife: I am reading all the books, websites and articles. I wish I could tell if one day I could be poly and happy but, for now, I am still working on it and literally have no clue what the future holds.

Kenzie — I am curious to know if you have been able to make this work. I was told this weekend that my boyfriend of 4 years, to be husband in December is poly. To clarify, I am not. Like many of the other posts I have read, I am feeling all of these emotions.

I am willing to try to make it work. I am highly open to suggestion at this point. Jessica, did he just realize this now? Or was he withholding this information? Observe how he acts when you talk candidly and directly about your own needs. Trying to make it work, even at great personal cost, is not a guarantee that he will stay. I feel exactly the same way. She moved to NY and they are contact frequently having phone sex or whatever.

After asking him directly, he confessed they love each other, but it has nothing to do with the love, commitment and connection we have. How does someone handle all that? So, so , so confused…. Sometimes we have to love people from afar no matter how much we wish things where different. Hello, I am currently going through something similar and would like to know how things worked out for you and your husband.

Can you please tell me how are you doing? I am currently in your situation, and i see this post is from , so would really like to know how is it going? On my end my husband is poly to his coworker and they meet up maybe 3times a month but text and talk. We have been together for 15 yrs and we have a 8yr old son. He is just now wanting to try this. How am I suppose to feel what am I suppose to feel? And if I say stop no more will that hurt him? IDK this stuff is a little too much and as you have I have been reading in hopes to understand and cope with how I feel.

My wife is at her boyfriends right now and it takes everything in me not to break. I feel like I have but 3 choices…. If that makes sense!

I would be happy if that happened but at the same time I would feel like utter crap for making her unhappy… and I love her too much to see her unhappy in any way! All of their other partners were mono which also made my partner really upset. But god it hurt so bad seeing the person you love most be in love with three other people. I think the relationship was so bad for me it made me hate poly relationships. Polyamory, moreso I feel than monogamy, is about experimentation and negotiation.

Relationships change, evolve, whether poly or mono. Relationships require hard work, poly or mono. You make some excellent points Sean. For someone who is very monogamous the pain may be worth it to continue the relationship.

What it down to is that everyone is different and should only do what makes them happy. What do you mean that if you are mono, you feel that the pain is worth it to continue with the relationship?

I love my partner so much but she feels that I am treating her like an object because she wants to connect with others in every way possible e. Well, to be contrarian and prove the rule that no rule is always true, I know someone on another board who went through a transition-into-poly thing that was like surgery without anesthesia — with the screams posted on the board all the way through — because she personally wanted to get to the other side.

Not because the others were making her as far as it looked online, anyway. Heck, I once went through an unexpected crying-in-the-pillow stage myself. There are times cut your losses and times to persevere. As poly becomes widely known as potentially workable, there will be less of this automatic screening against people who are not really motivated and committed.

The real solution will be for people to think up front about whether they want polyamory or exclusivity, and ask for it, when deciding whether to get into a serious relationship with someone.

Poly can enlightening if it is right for you. Inner freedom which is a part of my understanding enlightenment is the ability to know and to enact with joy what is right for yourself.

The Contract by Claire Thompson

Like the piece of the puzzle that always falls into the right place at the right time, out of the blue I was introduced to this handsome new and enthusiastic young man from Rumania, called Adrian; all of 34 and full of energy; bright and eloquent in English , unattached and looking for a place to stay and a stimulating job. He has a sweet personality, an almost formal charming middle European accent and a most polite manner. Adrian calls Philip "Mr. Philip" and me 'Boss 'or "Madame".

Of course in a tongue and cheek manner of speaking. He turned out to be a genius computer whiz kid and also knows how to keep this house clean, though getting up early in the morning is not his forte. Adrian and I have installed ourselves in my smallish but oh so cozy office, surrounded by 6 different screens. Spreadsheets on one screen, drop box items on the other , bb agencies on yet another screen and like a magician he is juggling bookings and blocking or deblocking rooms in swift tempo.

Friends visiting get comfortably installed in one of the three cozy leather red chairs That's what my night life looks like if I am not out visiting theatre plays, art exhibitions or dining at friends places.

The eternal insomniac who gets by with 4 to 5 hours sleep easily. Purring Siamese cats and sweet dogs surround me wherever I look. We are bound to make a big hit with our liaison with several of the best world wide known and respected BB agencies we have been hooked up since a few weeks Come spring our garden will no doubt start blooming again with roses, rhododendrons , oleander and Philip's special "happy herbs".

We will let the two dogs and 3 cats frolic around like all other animals I have had for the last 40 years. Hallelujah I am so glad I changed my mind before having signed my happiness away.

We both realized how my friends would miss the many fun parties: Cabaret acts or story tellers Come to meet Dr.

Robert Dunlap, fellow Sexologist and the film maker of the multiple award winning documentary about Xaviera's life. These two leading sex coaches www. Using lectures, media and personal stories participants will discover truth in sex while exploring all of its many dimensions. Our group is a diverse mix of sexologists, therapists, coaches, and tantra masters. This weekend is destined to be a powerful learning opportunity and a life-changing chance to network with some of the finest minds and practitioners in sexology from around the world.

A visit to the nearby Erotic Museum , O. Saturday evening April 21, at 8 pm.: Here, American erotic film maker, Jennifer Bell, now living in Amsterdam, will show you some interesting footage of her new film coming out later this year. Xaviera quite the Domina herself at times , is offering a special "duo gift" for the event. She has handpicked two lovely creatures to be bondage canvasses on which Artemis Hunter will rope paint.

K is a handsome and mature masochist transvestite and intimate "girl"-friend of Xaviera for years. Neither have ever been "lent" to any other Mistress. This will be their grand premiere with a live audience and Xaviera, as well as Mail and Female, would love to invite you to this event.

Since , Artemis Hunter has spent much of her time gathering knowledge from some of the world's finest rope bondage artists and BDSM practitioners. She's coming to Amsterdam to share insight as to how and why more and more everyday people are spicing up their sex lives with safe, sane, and consensual BDSM play. No presentation would be complete without witnessing a sampling of the power of BDSM play.

Artemis invites you to be a voyeur and experience some of the creative power that comes with informed BDSM adult play.

Xaviera's seasoned male lover of BDSM who is a heterosexual transvestite will be, for one evening only, Artemis' own special "girl" and stage plaything.

The dom is a caring one. About two thirds of the story, there are troubles from a secondary character to spice things a little. And we get our HEA. Except for sentences like: Thompson's writing was good, as usual. Even though I didn't find the story very original, I liked it. After a few pages, I was hooked and found myself willing to know what was going to happen next. So I give it three stars and a half rounded up to four.

Mar 23, Rosebud rated it really liked it Shelves: Jace Thompson hasn't had the best of luck lately as he's cheated on by his long time lover and loses his job because of the failing economy. Down to his last few dollars with no prospects in sight he's offered the job opportunity of a lifetime.

Lucrative salary and all expenses paid to be a contract service submissive on an private tropical island for an exclusive BDSM community. Running out of options he's persuaded to consider it.

Jace agrees to a tour of the island where he finds out the offer Jace Thompson hasn't had the best of luck lately as he's cheated on by his long time lover and loses his job because of the failing economy. It only takes one look at Quinn, the trainer, for Jace to realize he wants in. In more ways than one. Too bad others have taken a look at Jace and come to the decision that he'll be nothing but trouble and plan to do everything in their power to discredit him in the eyes of the islanders and Quinn.

Jace will have endure all types of submission if he plans to last which won't be easy as unknown people on the island are determined to force him to break his contract and leave, never to return again. That's what this is. Totally smoking hot with a side of kick ass intense. A total island of consensual manly fun where the only limitations are one's own hard limits.

My mind screamed 'pimp' and that Jace had better run for the hills. You all know what happens when something sounds too good to be true right? I just knew it. Guess I'll have to eat my words as Jace does indeed hit the lottery in a job if you can call it that with a core responsibility to be available for BDSM themed play and sex. Fast forward to the actual story line. This book has an interesting erotica based story line as Jace is recruited, goes through his 'interview' process, and eventually lands a position.

There is an additional slant of intrigue and murky undertones that adds an unexpected bonus to things. You know I don't do spoiler information so I can't get into this except to comment that it wasn't a stretch of the imagination blindside element but that didn't mean you won't be cheering after the big reveal happens. Yes, there are frequent BDSM play scenes all of which have the man on man action slant. Totally sucked me in as a wiling voyeur through thick and thin. There are issues that each have to work through before they can move forward and that's assuming the contracted tenure will allow relationships to even occur.

I will caution you that when I started to read this book I had doubts as Brandon's Lair had more of a frat party atmosphere than a legitimate BDSM club.

View all 4 comments. Jun 26, Serena Yates rated it really liked it Shelves: Jace has left his cheating boyfriend, then lost his job, and is somewhat at loose ends when he runs into Carlo, a mysterious man who makes him an offer he cannot refuse. The club he is recruited for caters to rich men, and Jae is determined to do a good job working as a staff submissive. What does make him worry is sadistic trainer Drew who seems determined to make him fail and who gets him into some pretty unsafe situations.

Jace deals with all of it by focusing on Quinn, the trainer he is fast falling for. Make no mistake — there are some darker moments when the BDSM borders on abuse, but it is made very clear this is not for titillation. A review by The Blogger Girls. This story starts out with your pretty typical, down-on-his luck guy, Jace, who has been cheated on, lost his job, has no money, etc. Lucky for him, he is handpicked by Carlos for a job on his private club island to work as a full-time sub via a three-month contract in exchange for a very large sum of money.

How could h A review by The Blogger Girls. How could he resist that? It does take Jace a little bit to become comfortable with some of the more difficult activities, which I expected and was happy to see. To be honest, I was exhausted just reading about their daily appointments and hours of service, even though most felt like they were in paradise. Quinn prefers to train with a more understanding approach and is mostly more into bondage and erotic submission, which Jace finds is what he longs for.

All in all, I found myself not wanting to put this down to see where it would go. It had quite a few elements that I enjoyed — the BDSM scenes were very well done and quite captivating, especially the Shibari, waterplay and caning scenes, and I liked that Jace and Quinn were both normal, somewhat on the same level financially and mentally.

I wish there had a been a bit more sexual tension, but overall, this was a really enjoyable story with a ton of hot and steamy scenes. Jun 24, Dre rated it really liked it Shelves: I really enjoyed this book, and I have to say that Albert was my favorite character in this one. How was he the only one who picked up on Drew's douchiness?! Speaking of Drew, his story ended a little to quickly and easily for me. Granted he was a total d-bag, and I wanted him gone, but I just don't think someone as crazy as Drew was, would go away that easily and quietly.

Even with Marty's threats. As for Quinn and Jace, I liked them, but I didn't love them. I don't really feel like I know Quin I really enjoyed this book, and I have to say that Albert was my favorite character in this one.

Aug 05, E. Jace is willing to sign a contract that requires that he service the members, but his biggest challenge is going to be the trainers, particularly the older man who makes him wish for the impossible. Those with triggers should make sure to read the blurb carefully and those in search of an entertaining and sexy BDSM story, have fun with this story!

A copy of this story was provided to me for review The writing was very good, as well as the plot and characters although Quinn and Jase's relationship could have been developed more. But since I'm not that into it, it was kind of lacking for me at times. Apr 16, Jen rated it liked it Shelves: Jace and Quinn 2.

Jul 28, Mary Clark rated it it was amazing. The book highlights the ups and downs of the guests, clients and service subs who live at the private resort.

Drew is protective of his relationship with Quinn, but to him Jace is a threat; just like Tony was all those years ago. Brandon is looking for a seasoned player to scene with; someone who is strong, brave, not afraid to suffer, and is ready to fly. But does Jace have the courage and passion to do a scene so intense it will wipe away all vestiges of the worst week of his life; Carlo has been watching Jace and seems to think so.

With no job, money, lover, prospects or future, Jace feels truly alone, but will he accept the opportunity Carlo is offering him; a 3-month contract as a service sub. Jace is unsure if he has what it takes, but agrees to spend a weekend at the Club; after all what did he have to lose. It might even be a new chapter in his life.

Quinn is in the training cabana, but is momentarily distracted the moment Jace steps off the yacht behind Carlo. Drew though had been persistent, and if he were honest he had been lonely; even so, love had never entered the mix between them.

The service subs all seem happy and the trainers were very knowledgable; even if he ends up hating the experience he could endure anything for 3-months.

Then there is Quinn. Jace felt something more had passed between them, and for him, at least, the connection had been immediate and intense. Jace is excited and jittery about the experience that awaits him and even though he feels reasonably sure of what to expect, the prospect still seems somewhat surreal. Drew has convinced Jace that he will never make it as a true sub and no matter what he does it never seems to be good enough.

Until recently the relationship between Quinn and Drew has satisfied them both. Now Quinn finds he wants more; with Jace he can finally be happy. Drew is out for revenge and systematically implements a series of setups to undermine Jace, thereby creating potentially dangerous situations. It is not the first time Drew has done something like this; years ago he discredited Tony by circulating false rumours about him.

Drew is convinced of the success of the latest part of his plan, but little does he realise that behind the scenes he is the one being setup. A copy of this book was provided to me with no requirements for a review. I voluntarily read this book and my comments here are my honest opinion.

Aug 05, Debra Guyette rated it it was amazing. Jace Thompson is not sure what he is going to do. Betrayed by his lover and losing his job left him with no money, no prospects and no future. He would go to a private Florida Key where wealthy clients are served by submissives who are paid to meet thier every desire. When Jace decides to accept a contract, he is evaluated by Trainer Quinn who finds himself intrigued by the young submissive.

Jace returns the sentiment. Both Jace Thompson is not sure what he is going to do. Both men want to get to know each other better but Quinn's ex-boyfriend cannot allow that. He sets out to make Jace's life miserable. His actions get progressively dangerous for both Jace and the clients he serves. Jace was an amazing submissive. When he gave his submission, it was done with natural grace and beauty. When he worked with Quinn, the two were so in sync it was obvious that they belonged together.

Quinn's ex was more than annoyed and he broke some rules that should never be broken in his quest to drive Jace away. Every one has thier differrent wants, needs and limits. They should be observed carefully so no one is harmed. Claire Thompson is blessed with the ability to bring the beauty and individuality of BDSM to life in the pages of her works. The Contract clearly indicates this. The story shows us how a BDSM life style should be, complete with all the necessary safety features.

I know I shall be looking for more of her amazing portrayals. Jul 21, Dar rated it it was amazing Shelves: The book starts out with a crack, literally. Jace is watching a scene at his favourite BDSM club, overcome with the state of his life at the moment. The owner of the club, and scene master, notices him and brings him up for the next demonstration.

Carlos, who spoke to Jace while he was in the crowd, helps Jace achieve his calm on stage, and his aftercare. Jace's problems overwhelm him, and he lets Carlos in on what is going on. Suddenly, it seems Carlos has the answer to all of Jace's problems! D The book starts out with a crack, literally. Delving into the sexy fantasy world where BDSM is your life, your job, your pleasure, and the variety of people you come into contact with, was exciting from the start.

You get to see everything from Jace's perspective, his awe, wonder, concerns, and doubts. His reactions are normal, titillating, and his fear is real, while his submission is evident. There is discovery, and the stretch of his world, while he finds himself more clearly they he ever thought possible There is romance, love, and there is betrayal.

Quinn is the object of Jace's emotional attentions, but someone else, with darker motives, believe's Quinn to be his. A plan is set in motion to get rid of Jace, yet, Jace is made of stronger stuff, and Quinn has his back, and people are fed up with the bad guy. This leads to Jace and Quinn finding their HEA, and what a wonderful journey it is for them to get there I was completely and utterly drawn in and couldn't set this story down once I started! Aug 02, Armenia rated it really liked it.

Both meet on the island resort which caters to rich clients with a proclivity for everything BDSM. At 26, Jace Thompson is recruited as a submissive to cater to guests and clients of the resort. Working with Quinn makes Jace yearn to have him as his Dom. Peter Quinn is intrigued by the spark he feels from Jace. As a trainer and a Dom with the resort, Quinn is astonished how Jace is such a natural in his submission.

You bring passion and commitment to your submission. A rival takes revenge trying to discredit Jace to keep them apart. With all of Ms. What happens at this resort is eye-opening and fascinating. They are all different and require different levels of dedication. Jace is a sub who has just left a relationship with his dominant. And then to heap insult onto injury, he lost his job. When he goes to the club to watch a scene, he gets invited to join another demo.

After that demo, he was invited to go to an exclusive gay BDSM resort as a service sub, available to anyone who wants him. Quinn is a trainer at the resort. He helps clients learn new skills and helps train subs to be better. He has been a FWB with one of the other trainers, but that's been fading for a while.

When he sees Jace, he's instantly attracted to him, and knows that it's time to do something. I really enjoyed this book. The conflict felt so real. Everyone has dealt with someone like the antagonist at some point, so it was really relatable.

Jul 05, Gab rated it really liked it. Come to Fantasy Island! Jace, laid off construction worker gets an offer he can't refuse at his local BDSM haunt. Spend three months as a service sub at a private island for wealthy clients and cash a hefty sum at the end. Arriving at the island everything seems to go quite well, apart from Quinn, that fascinating trainer he can't keep out of his head.

Learning how to satisfy every whim of the islands customers he's quickly in high demand. But his best learning experiences Come to Fantasy Island! But his best learning experiences are the Shibari sessions with trainer Quinn. The almost poetic description of those sessions is one of the highlights of this book. And by the celebration at the end, the whole fantastic setup feels like a perfectly normal gathering of work mates with you right in the middle of it.

A playground for Doms and submissives alike where your every wish or desire is fulfilled. Peter Quinn, a club trainer, is a little older, more mature and a seasoned Dom. Jace is submissive to the core and not only list his job but his Dom within the space of two days.

Both men are drawn to each other from the moment Jace steps on the island. Learning how to sink into his submission is a challenge and Jace lives for his training sessions with Quinn. Quinn's heart has been shuttered for so long but he finally starts to feel again when he's with Jace.

Even a jealous troublemaking play partner cannot break the bond forming between the two men and they find what they've both been searching for Jul 14, Kerry rated it it was amazing. This one was packed with steamy scenes and a beautiful love story of two men who simply were lost and found each other despite the unconventional way they met.

With some suspense and some thrilling scenes that keep you guessing how Jace especially will overcome obstacles in his path, Claire keeps her readers loyal and cheering for this love match from the very first page until the end in a HEA. I have to admit, I loved the idea of the secret island off the Florida Keys and would love to see more of Carlo and Theon's tale as well of that of Conrad, Marty and Master Brandon.

This one is certainly one to read Jul 22, Brandi rated it liked it. Aug 12, Philomena Callan Cheekypee rated it it was amazing Shelves: I cannot praise this author highly enough. This author knows how to write her hot and steamy reads.

thoughts on “ You Don’t Have to Do It ” LadyPoetess January 7, at am. If both partners want to remain involved romantically, but are not suited to long-term primary relationships, sometimes secondary-style situations work better. Dee Dee Blancharde was a model parent: a tireless single mom taking care of her gravely ill child. But after Dee Dee was killed, it turned out things weren’t as they appeared — and her daughter Gypsy. Just go into the place and meet the girls, all this crap about viewing and wanting info about them on social media is all shit. Here is a description of girls and prices, they all have the right equipment and do a great job, prices are the same as everywhere else and you all ring around so you know the prices.