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She went away but in the following days kept asking more and more detailed questions of her mother. Why black men, what did dad get out of it, questions about the lifestyle, if dad gets to have sex with other women etc. Her mother explained as much as she could or what she thought was age appropriate, she was only seventeen at the time.
The husband said that was a very strange summer, that more than her mother she looked at him differently. It was like the more she found out the more she wanted to know. His wife never kept their daughter's curiosity a secret and even went as far to say to her that she should ask her father when questions came up about his desire to be cuckolded by her. For whatever reason he told me she never once had a question or a conversation with him about any of it.
Not what she had saw that day, how she felt about what she saw, her continued interest, nothing. And he didn't think it appropriate to initiate one with her. But when she came home the next summer, she was a changed girl. She admitted to her mother that while she dated white guys in college, she felt a string sexual desire for black guys and had fucked several behind her boyfriends back. This didn't come as a shock to her mother given all that they had been talking about over the months.
Than she asked did she know dad was a cuckold, that he would not only accept her being with black men but want her to fuck them too. She thought the boy she was currently dating just might also be a good candidate to be a cuckold. That when she finally marries a guy she would prefer him to be ok with a lifestyle such as what her and dad had too. Jump forward, after college the daughter is living with same boyfriend but lives I guess close enough to home that her and her mother occasionally hang out.
Usually at bars known to be frequented by blacks. He wasn't sure of the boyfriend knew but went on to tell me that they, mother and daughter have indeed played together. Not with each other but with the same black guys and sometimes groups of black guys at the same time. Yes, he has gotten to watch his wife and daughter service and used by black cock but has never did more than that.
I can't say if any of this is actually true but I will say that in his profile were pics of two women. One I knew to be his wife and the other younger and she has features that could be seen as a family resemblance. Also there was just a excitement that came across but also a distinct sadness, which makes me feel that this was a heartfelt experience to him.
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Many people are here looking for a BBC. Few talk about anything other than the feeling they get from that BBC. I usually see the experience described in a selfish way or with perspective of what that BBC can do for them.
I love interracial sex. When I describe it, I describe in a selfish way as to what it does for me. The question I have to the white women and couples of the group is would you be seen in public with that BBC?
If you are a single white woman, would you introduce this man as a man you are dating to your closest friends? Sometimes I feel we are good enough to fuck but not good enough to date. Needless to say that attitude pisses me off. If you are open and public with your interest than this post is not directed to you. This is directed to the other Black M and the white women who hide us.
Women, tell us why you hide and men tell us how you like being hidden? Of I course I do.. His big hands holding mine.. This is a hot topic and I've compared it almost to modern day dare I say "slavery"? I think it's exploitation but I've been told you can't exploit the willing. This topic always stirs the pot and it boils down to each their own. I always find this topic interesting. This is a very good subject, because i've thought about it a lot.
Many guys, especially white men, would love to have this type of stereotype. But that's what it is. First off, not every blk man is hung like a horse. Which is why I thought about it.
A blk friend of mine told me that a cute white woman wanted to hook up with him at a party, but when he told her his size, average, like 7. When I think about it, I want a gorgeous white woman to want me because I'm attractive to her, not because of what I have below the belt.
When I hear " I want a black man" because shes attracted to them, it does make me feel good about myself. But when I hear " I want a BBC" or " a black man who's very well hung" I'm thinking she just wants a dildo with a black man attached to it.
Its like when I look at white women. I am attracted to them from head to toe. There are sooo many gorgeous women out there it drives me crazy. Probably one of worst experiences I had was when I was told by a woman she wanted my "Nigger Dick". That shit threw me back so much that I had to stop and address it immediately. Afterwards her husband and I met up a few times after that for some hardcore Fucking. She squirted every time I put my "BBD" in her booty, lol.
We met at bars and hotels no one was seeking anything serious. I hear that women will approach a man without knowing his thoughts on it though and that's just rude. At least get a feel for the person. If the man doesn't have anything about BBC in his profile then don't message him with "I wanna ride your bbc from her to kingdom cum".
Now if he proclaims that he is a man that likes being use for his BBC and that's what you want then go for it. I'm not a fan of the term BBC either, but it suits the situation. Race play, as in give me that "niggah dick" is also quite crass to me.
Some men want to hear it, but I dislike saying it and playing that way. If he and I are the only ones that know, I'm hiding something. If I'm hanging on his arm, I'm showing off. I'm still searching for that win win scenario with today's society. Being called a "nigger lover" or a "nigger slut" by my own race is disheartening, but doesn't sway me, or keep me away from being with whom I choose. My heart sees no color. My heart sees no gender. Yes, I'm attracted to tall dark black men, so?
What's that to you? How does that effect you? Why do you hate me for being happy, content and properly loved? Why do you hate him for my choices? You being the collective "you" of society grinding us for our choices. I'm sick to death of being judged by "you". It seems to me, the most hateful words spoken to me on this subject, were from some bitter very unhappy people who wretch at the the thought of others being happy with someone other than them. To them I say, "fuck you..
I think just as long as I'm respected and related to as an "equal" or on an intelligent level, I'm OK with it. Even if it's on the "Down low". One thing that I notice about lots of couples into BBC is that they seem to like Brothers who look like they just got out of prison, belong to gangs or just off the "Slave ship" or some shit Could these same people also relate to a Black man on a more intellectual level?
I Swung with an Asian couple about two years ago. The lady was really into BBC - like 10" n shit. I'm only 8" - LOL. I think they came from money, like lots of Asians. I made the lady cum and me and the Hubby worked her over pretty good. But when they left, it was like I was a "throw away" or something. I felt somewhat "used"! So, if that's all you are is a "BBC", not cool. My husband is a " black" man, and to tell you the truth the size thing was his fetish of wanting to see me with them, as he is average sized.
So much for the stereotypical white man only having this delicious fetish as well! This same subject can be said for blondes as everyone seems to want a blonde. Also a few of the largest cocks I have had were indeed white as well as black. I used to get upset at the trend of the last decade or so of white womens attraction to black men as members of my own family were upset at my marriage to my husband 22 years ago. Not to mention the sneering looks concerning my children from actually all 3 races concerned which is what really pissed me off.
Obviously none of it stopped us from marrying. My own father hasn't spoken ro me in all that time. But then he was never there anyway,now get this, because I was half native! Well to tell the truth, people are people as my husband has always said. Ultimately however, it depends on how well we click personality wise.
And I would not ever be attracted to the thug persona. The exception has been those times we have gone to the places in which the thug mentality frequents,white, black or otherwise. As to the original questions, yes and since we are now married, yes I have.
The question these days are whether we can be seen in public because I am married! LOL The answer to That is I have been in so many situations and been called so many things that BBC would be a welcomed term. But that is from a broader societal point. And to some others points it goes both ways as far as being seen in public. I have had some play partners who don't mind and actually love being seen together. I have others in the lifestyle and vanilla relationships who have wanted to keep the relationship ambiguous in public It really depends on your If the nature of your relationship is one that is established as a fuck only, let's push the limits type then the consenting adults should be able to say this is what it is and this is what I want and this is as far as I am willing to go But as with anything communication and personal comfort is essential I can only change what is in my world and how I approach things.
I have been inter racially inclined since I was a very young girl I loved him dearly. I grew up in Montana, where it was all Native American and White kids in our school. They were very racist against each other and more so to this young Black boy in our school. I grew up with a really bad taste for people like that and knew I was very different in my beliefs.
Once I started dating, the first boyfriend I had was Black and my family hated me for it. To this day, my sisters will criticize me for my choices, but I blame the way we were raised.
Thank goodness it didn't manifest in me, if anything, I went completely to the other end of the spectrum and recognize the hatred in it. My first child was with a Black man that I dated and when my son was born, they were still angry, even when this beautiful child was part of our family now.
I don't need to explain to anyone why I choose to date as I do or love who I do. It is my personal business and would certainly be seen in public with my partner. I have no shame in who I am with or why I am with them, because know that if I am with them, it is because they are a smart and worthy individual and have made me desire them as a person Just as I would want my partner to be seen with me as a smart and worthy individual.
Many times I get judged for my body type and have had men who only wanted me to fuck and nothing more, not be seen with me, BBW lovers in the bedroom. They didn't make it far with me, as I am a complete package.
To each their own I need more than a great cock to engage I just got out of the shower, wrapped up in a big fluffy towel still dripping wet.
As I lay down in bed, pulling out my wand, I start licking and spitting on it, thinking about your cock in my mouth. I'm already wet, not just from my shower but from thinking about you. About you spanking me and telling me what a dirty little slut I am as you shove your cock in my mouth.
I start rubbing my nipples, getting them harder and harder. I just started playing and already I'm so sensitive. I resist the urge to just shove my wand right onto my clit. I want to tease myself for you, make the pleasure last longer. I play with my tits, drool all over my wand I turn it on low and place it on one of my nipples.
The shock it sends to me has me moaning instantly. Already rock hard, my nipples get harder and more sensitive and I get wetter, moaning and wiggling around. God, master, I wish you could see me, tell me what a nasty little whore I am. I'm so desperate for pleasure I'll do anything to get it. Thinking about you laughing while you watch me writhe in pleasure makes me even wetter, I moan out your name.
I can't help it anymore, I have to touch my clit. Just for a little bit, just for a little bit more of that pleasure that I'm so addicted to. I lick my fingers, and slowly, tentatively, put them on my clit, savoring just the light pressure and all the sensations that I get from it. I moan louder, and start rubbing my clit in little circles, my hips jerking up and down with the motion, I drop my wand and start sucking on my fingers.
I wish you were here, I wish I could suck on your cock. I need something big in my mouth. I need you, master, I need you in my mouth. As I get closer and closer to cumming, my hips start moving faster and faster, my moans louder and louder, my fingers moving faster and faster. I grab my tit, playing with the nipple, pinching and squeezing it. Finally, I cum with only one thought on my mind, "I'm your dirty little slut, I'm your dirty little slut, I'm your dirty little slut, I'll do anything for you, I'll do anything for you, I want to please you master!!!
I lay back, turning off my wand, my legs shaking just a bit, my pussy juices leaking all over the bed, and I try to catch my breath. My clit is throbbing, my nipples still rock hard, the slight breeze from the window sends a jolt of pure ecstasy through my whole body.
I grab my phone to see if you had texted me, and start scrolling through the pictures you've sent me. Just looking at your cock, I start getting horny all over again. I start teasing my clit again, looking at your cock, I want you so badly master, I want to cum for you, all over your face and your cock and anywhere else you want me to cum.
I would do anything for you master, I want to please you. I'm dripping, and feeling how wet I am for you just turns me on more. I grab my wand, and turning it on low, I place is right on my clit, just barely touching it.
Feeling the pleasure I get from it, I start moaning, my hips moving and grinding against it. Whimpering, I pinch my nipples and slap them, wishing you were here to spank me and tell me what a naughty slut I am. Oh master, I wish you could see me right now. Naked, soaking wet, playing with myself. I'm so horny, I need a cock in my tight little pussy.
I need your cock master. I start grinding harder and faster on my wand, I can feel my pussy start to clench. I keep thinking about all the ways you're going to torture me, tease my pussy, punish me for being such a slut. Oh master, I'm so happy to be your slut!
I'll do anything for you!! I squirt as I start cumming again, wishing I was riding your cock so I could please you as much as I've been pleased so far.
My legs shaking, everything is soaking, I can barely breath and I still haven't had enough. I want more master, more of you, more pleasing you, more pleasure, more anything, more everything. I don't let up, I turn my wand up higher, my sensitive clit throbbing in pain and pleasure. I get up without taking my wand off my clit, and sit on it. I start moving my hips back and forth, from side to side, playing wit my tits the entire time. Moaning and groaning, begging for release, for you to come and tell me what to do, make me do what you want, use me as your slave.
I'm your slut, master, I'll do anything for you!! I cum almost screaming again. My clit is throbbing and hurts so good. Thank you black master, thank you! Yet, that same night, Lamar was more than 1, miles away admiring strippers at Downtown Cabaret in Minneapolis.
For the longest time, I thought I had everything figured out. You get good grades in school, go to college, get a good job. Nice car, nice house, lots of expensive clothes. Now I finally understand. I was born to be bred by black men. I just want as many big black dicks as I can get. They can all form a line from my bedroom to around the block.
I was made to be used. My opinions and desires are meaningless. My only purpose in this world is to be used by strong black men as a breeding machine. All that matters is pleasing black men with my mouth, cunt and ass so they can put more black babies inside of me.
If that means I end up a single mother of 12 or more black bastard children, then so be it. I need to be shamed and humiliated. There could be a fee paid to each man who attempts to knock me up, and then a bonus to any who manage to get me pregnant. They would deserve to be compensated for all of the hard work they put in towards giving me what I need.
His sweet little princess who can do no wrong. I have to go through with this. I want groups of black men to continue to use me as their personal cumdumpster. Put your babies inside of me. I hope the boys grow up to impregnate as many white women as possible, and that the girls end up being shameless whores just like their mother. Fuck me at an orgy and brag to all of your friends about how many dicks I took, or how much cum you saw all over my face, hair, and tits.
How it was sliding out of my cunt, nonstop. And I was born to be bred by black men. I couldnt just keep standing by without saying something about the countless married white women I see in clubs and bars looking for nigga dicks behind their husbands backs. Some of them never even bother taking off their wedding rings, they just dont give a shit about hurting their white husbands feelings. Is black dick really that good and worth all the hassles? Im a white guy who loves my fellow white women but damn in white women have taken this shit to a new low!
I really dont think some white men have a clue at how fast a white women will flat out lie about her feelings for the darker things in life. They only care about maintaining their lifestyle with a big house and car off the white mans back! This is so fucking wrong! I had to drop you guys a line to put these scandaleous white bitches on blast!
I dont want my daughter to grow up lying, and cheating to satisfy her own selfish sex acts! I saw this old trout in a club with several young white gold diggers! The guy who took the photo was black and I bet once the old trout left alone, they all laughed as the black guy fucked these dirty white bitches up their ass!!!
White men are so fucking stupid, somebody needs to warn them! Another married white bitch with a big smile on her face while her dick less white husband takes a photo. Give me a fucking break white man. Nationally, Hispanics are already the fastest growing demographic, with their demographics seen increasing by 3. State wise, New Mexico has the highest percentage of Hispanics among their entire population, seeing White non-Hispanics make up Once the economy improves the state expects to see growth at an average of , annually through , a figure largely supported by birth opposed to migration.
It is fact that our beautiful, strong Black Men have several quiet stalkers at their back threatening their well being, especially as they get older.
Black men are less likely to be diagnosed with heart disease, but are 30 percent more likely to die from this condition compared to white men. Black men are also more likely to have hypertension, or high blood pressure. Considering these stats, our Black Daddies have their work cut out for them.
However, is that responsibility limited to only kink and household chore-type service? Or does it extend at all to health and wellness such as eating right, diet, doctor's visits, etc? Are the increased risk factors a consideration in service? How do you address to your Daddy any concerns you may have? What if your Daddy doesn't want to address health issues or is resistant to those uncomfortable tests? Do your increased health factors influence you to be intentionally healthier or do you ignore your increased risks?
What are your expectations of your s-type's service Do you expect and encourage her to cook healthy, get you to the doctor, encourage you to workout? Or do you shut her out of this area of your life and why? I am proud to say that with my tender, loving care my Black Daddies have gotten off all their medications and restored their health to optimum levels.
I think it takes our commitment to make it happen consistently but I have always found Black Daddies to be very open to natural health products. My girl tries to cook healthy hearty meals for me. She encourages me to eat fruit throughout the day something I was never good at.
She reminds me to take my meds and we work together on the challenges that come with my medications. I can't have too many leafy green vegetables because the vitamin K absorbs one of my medications and diminishes it's effects, for example. She encourages me to take a nap during the day because my energy can diminish if I am running too much.
She understands that stress exacerbates my condition and tries to Avado stressing me My Daddy is pretty darn good at listening to me when we discuss health concerns. I don't struggle getting him to listen to suggestions that address wellness. I basically say what my concern is and if it needs further discussion or explanation he asks questions or takes time tell me information that I was missing. What I do struggle with it is not about getting him to go take tests or going to the doctor, but rather about helping him through the bureaucratic nightmare of getting the assistance he needs.
All I can really do is be supportive emotionally to help him deal with the frustrations of red tape. Basically I can just say at breakfast, "breakfast is ready!
For lunch I offer a few choices, for example "You want a greek salad or cucumber salad? When it comes to exercise it's a little tougher. He is restricted by doctors orders in what he can do. Yet there are things he can do, but the interest in some of the few cardio exercises allowed is not great to say the least lol.
What I am trying to do and is receiving a warmer response is to find some physical activities that we both enjoy, for example salsa dancing. I am also working of getting him to do yoga which he doesn't seem totally opposed to: Let me be the first and probably only Man to reply to this very important post. Since I know for a fact that I am pre-disposed to certain health risks the older I get, I do what I can to stay as healthy as I can.
I also have plans in the future to do more to keep me as healthy as possible. If their is a relationship and you aren't just play partners, the sub has a vested interest in the health of her Dom. She should definitely be involved in. Mine stays on me about my health, asks questions, and reminds me of things I need to do like eating right and stretching.
I think that depends on whether both parties live together. If they don't, then the cooking thing is a difficult thing to achieve. Encouraging ones man to take care of himself, get to the doctor, and eat right is the RIGHT thing to do. As a Black men, I know we don't share what's usually going on with us, we don't necessarily open up without some prompting. So when it comes to this area, the conversations can get pretty I say to those subs that love their Doms, stay on him.
If he has your heart, mind, and soul then you have the right to make sure he's around as long as possible. Yes, you read right. Last night, my favorite chocolate stud muffin and I came home and started fucking, because there isn't much else to do in this boring town where we live. And no, I didn't feel like driving down to Birmingham for some night life.
Anyhow, we were going at it, in the shower no less, when I just felt like trying That which I said I'd never try. And no one was more surprised about this than my guy. Three nights before, I fucked his ass with my favorite strap-on, and even though there were some cringe-worthy moments, it was fun for both of us.
When I told him I wanted to get fucked in MY ass, he was shocked. Anyhow, we did it. Using only soap and shampoo as lubricant because this isn't a fucking porno and there's never any KY around when you need it. Only side effect I can think of is that it, um, makes you fart a lot afterwards. Other than that, I highly recommend anal sex as a fun sexual activity, ladies and gents! Was really depressed by the Packers loosing to the 49ers last night so I decided to go to the bar after the game to drown my sorrows.
It was a bar in Chicago I never went to before but it was on my way home so I stopped. As I sat and siped my drink 3 black guys came in and sat close to me and were talking about the game and how S F dominated the packers. I just said "S F sucked and just got lucky" One guy looked at me and said "You must be a Packer man" I said damn right and he began to down grade the packers to the point where I just said "Would you just shut the fuck up"?
He said No he has the right to say what he wants. I got up and went in the back by the restrooms there was a table and chairs back there. As I sat there about 10 mins later the 3 of them walked back and started bad mouthing again. I said Fuck leave me alone" One guy stood by me and said "We will leave you alone if you suck on this" he was holding his crotch. I said "Fuck you' and got up and he pushed me back down and said "Your gonna suck my dick mother fucker' He unziped his pants and pulled out his soft cock and shoved it in my face and said "Open your mouth mother fucker' I was scared so I opened my mouth and he shoved it in my mouth.
He ordered me to start sucking so I did. He kept this up for a while and my fear began to turn to lust I began to really enjoy this big cock going in and out of my mouth. I settled down and worked it nice and he moaned he was gonna nut so I closed my lips tight and he let loose with a load that went straight down my throat I swallowed as fast as I could it tasted so good I wanted every drop when he stopped I squeezed his cock and got the last drops on my tongue to savor.
I agreed so we all left the bar and got in his car which was parked by near by and his two friends and I got in the back seat and they took out their beautiful black cocks and allowed me to suck them off till they shot their cum in my mouth and I fuckin loved every drop I gave them my cell phone number and asked them to call me next week when S F plays and I will meet them any where and take care of any one or more if they want.
Cant help it love the taste of beautiful black cock. In order to prepare for the foreign soccer players who will be visiting for the World Cup in , prostitutes residing in Sao Paulo, Brazil are going to take free English classes to better serve their prospective clients next year. The association is organizing the classes and hiring teachers with the money their employees make.
These prostitutes just keep getting harder to resist. I am just curious to know what is the first thought white female subs think of when they envision their ideal BBC or black dom counter part. Do you want a black man who is well spoken and knowledgeable? Do you want a black man to think and dress in his own style and not be a cookie cutter clone of what you see on tv? Do you covet simply his physical appearance or does his drive and imagination excite you as well?
Would you still have apprehension if he approached you in the street? If you were not married to a white cuck would you still feel safe being alone with a black man? Can you except him as black if he were of lighter complexion or dark as the night itself?
Does he have to be the constant suave cool person everywhere he goes or will being honest, whitty, and somewhat goofy do if he has confidence in himself? I ask all these questions in the hope that some of you will actually take time to think about them yourself and be brutally honest in your answers.
Being politically correct or sensitive to others feelings about this is in my opinion lying to yourselves and keeping you from true self realization about how you choose to interact with your distant relatives of another skin color. I know this discussion isn't as titillating as some of the others here but I'm hoping to gain some insight. For me it isn't how light or dark His skin is, what music He listens to or even how He dresses.
It is all in His presence There is a strength in a black mans face that no other man can ever possess. His physical appearance and initial impression is what gets him "in the door". Then, when we talk, it is who he is as a man that closes the deal, so to speak. That frankly doesn't take too long to determine. If he feels the need to act "cool", or to show what a man he is, or to act "gangsta", the evening or whenever will end in the first few minutes. Well, I am married to a white man, and a great one at that, So I really have no point of view to answer this.
Well, that depends on the environment. If it is publicly, people around, all is good. If it is dark, not well lit, no or very few people close by, I don't care what race of man he is, I'm scared and leaving fast!
To be honest i love a well dress, smart black man who is a bedroom bully in the bedroom, but i dont know how other married women may feel about this, but my husband always seem to have a problem with the connection i have with men like this. The holidays have came and went so now its time for us to get back to some nasty black cock slut shit!!! The Orlando native has in the past been linked to the likes of Waka Flocka and Soulja Boy, and she's currently pursuing a career as a rapper.
In the video, a stripper named Jessica is the one filming the sexual interactions, and she is the same woman who Evelyn exchanged words with on Twitter in the past. Now as for Wankaego, she's definitely packing some real eye candy in those curves. Check out her pictures, and the stripper Jessica's pictures above.
Funny that even in this day in age some people still stare at interracial couples what do you do when your out with someone of the opposite sex and people stare? I personally love it and make sure I give her a big Kiss when it happens to me, although i will admit it doesn't happen often to me, I have heard people have completely different experience then I, how about you have you had this happen and when it does what do you do? It would mostly come from Black women. I had one woman say, "I don't want no cream in my coffee.
That would be grammatically correct. Also, judging from your general size and disposition, you should look into a non-dairy, low-fat creamer to help combat that morbid obesity you're dealing with. Nowadays I just play into it and get more affectionate and most times inappropriately so.
Then I cut whoever is staring, a shit eating grin. I can't help it. I find myself wondering if they're just friends, married, or if her husband knows? And that I know they are looking, they usually stop staring, cause I can mean mug pretty damn well.. She rolled up in a beautiful BMW. That got some stares!
LOL It also depends on how you carry yourself as well. If you don't get all uptight and just ignore any Idiots, most normal people really don't care.
I met a friend on lunch and this guy just started staring with disapproval. I smiled at the guy and I gave my friend a really nice passionate kiss, I'm a bit of an exhibitionist anyways. The guy shook his head and kept on walking Mind you I live in Northern California where interracial couples are not a rarity. My friend had been at the bar for about an hour before I got there.
He was alone and at the corner of the bar. When I walked in I gave him a quick hug and sat down besides him. Two ladies about 2 bar stools away just "stink eyed" me for a good minute. They might have been disgusted that we were together or maybe they were jealous that they couldn't snag him.
I smiled, leaned in closer to my friend and told him about it. We both had a good laugh and then proceeded to get lost in our own world. I think for the most part it is a lot better than it was in the 80s. Back then it might have caused a fight.
Now I tend to not pay attention to people who stare. Although I was out with a man and we kept getting side eye from two black women. He just pulled me close put his tongue down my throat and his hand up my skirt. Since they were already talking he gave them a little PDA to talk about lolol He also loudly said, "I would date a hot intelligent white girl over an uptight black chick any day. Especially the angry, money hungry, drama queen kind. Mom told me then if I believe in what I'm doing, keep my head high and ignore, ignore, ignore.
It was difficult in those early years, and I loved walking down the street in racist Glendale, California in , holding hands and kissing my boyfriend, watching all the older white folks having heart attacks. I was once told that I should stick to my own kind. I see someone staring, I want to climb on his lap and give him the sexiest kiss I can manage.
Yes, ladies and gents we made it 10 years of fucking hot white women! Here are a few pix of our crazy party on Friday night, it was fucking off the chain!!!! Latina ass stole the night!!!
Driving to his apartment, I ask myself, am I really doing this? As I get to his door, I take a deep breath. I feel slightly anxious, but more excited and enticed by what is to come. I open the door to the lights off, candles lit, and sensual music in the background.
I face the wall with my head down, and every few minutes he comes behind me, telling me how sexy I look, and rubbing up, down, and between my legs. My body is so excited, and all I want to do is lift my head and kiss him. He occasionally lets me feel his cock from outside of his pants. I can feel it getting harder as I do what daddy tells me. After what feels like eternity of waiting against the wall, B opens the door and she joins me on the wall.
He switches between us, caressing our legs and our bodies. Then, he tells B to rub my ass, my legs, and eventually between my legs. The second her hands are on me, I can tell it is her. Her touch is soft and sensual. I instantly feel excitement rushing through my body, and I can feel myself getting wetter. Standing behind her, I place my hands on her amazing, tight ass.
I love running my hands over her body, and feeling how warm she is between her legs. Daddy then takes us separately to the couch, each taking our pants down to our calves, and bending over the couch with our heads down.
He spanks B for being late. I hear her say thank you, such a sexy voice. But still I have not seen her. I take my tight pants off, but keep my black patent pumps on as B comes behind me and begins to touch my pussy.
Again, from the second her hand touches my body, I know it is her. She touches me just long enough that I can only imagine how amazing the rest of the evening will unfold. Her soft, warm skin is incredibly beautiful. I love touching her warm, wet pussy. I wonder what mine felt like to her. He tells us softly and slowly kiss each other.
I love feeling her soft lips against mine. Then we share his cock. I love sharing it with B, as we both run our lips and tongues over him. After he has had enough of this, he tells us to lay on the couch and Finally I get to taste her. She is so warm, wet, and tastes so good. I love putting my tongue in her and feeling her dripping pussy with my fingers.
I love kissing B after this, and tasting myself in her mouth. First, he fucks Brandy, and I love watching him thrust in and out of her.
Having his hard cock in my pussy feels so amazing. I had forgotten how good he felt. B is caressing my body. In this moment, this is all I want. After daddy has enough of fucking us, he directs me to kneel down against the bed. He takes B away, and I wonder what they are doing. I soon find out anyway. B has a thick, hard strap on and begins to fuck me gently. This hard cock feels incredible and knowing B is behind me only gets me more excited.
She is gentle, but firm enough. I want to ask her to go a little deeper, a little faster. But without saying a word, she knew when to give it to me a little harder.
This entirely excites me. He takes it slow, but deep. I massage his ass, and touch his body. B begins by rubbing the body wash all over my body, up and down my legs. I feel that I have definitely been missing out. B and I begin kissing. Daddy gets jealous so he joins us in the shower. I love our three warm bodies so close together.
We each face the wall while he gives us more attention. My body is in heaven. So much touch, stimulation, and pleasure in such a short time. As I drive home, I think about how the night unfolded, and replay my favorite parts of the night in my head. All I can wonder is why I waited so long. My body feels so entirely relaxed and pleased. Take a look at the cocks I have to deal with every day, I need a thick black cock in my pussy like yesterday"!!!!
Mandy we feel your pain, give us a call the world famous blackbachelor is here to help! And that goes for any other white wives who are looking to get your black blown out!!! Email us and we will get your some fresh BBC asap!!! Life is too short only to fuck little dick white men the rest of your time on planet earth!!! I was raised in a strict middle class household and I believe in following the word of God. It gives me great pleasure to get on my knees every night and worship my black master big, thick horse cock!
Yes, it hurts my jaw muscles from time to time, but its worth it. A good women should never allow her master to go to bed with balls full of sperm. Its my job to keep his nut sack empty, I would not be a good submissive if I did anything less. Yes, my father was some what of a racist he worked in an old factory with a lot of black guys and he hated his job! He would come home and tell me stories on how black guys would show up late to work because they were out partying and chasing women all night!
That made me curious about being with men who didnt have a care in the world! It pissed my father off even more when I use to go to the company picnics with short dresses on and all the black guys use to stare at me, that made my pussy wet all the time!
I ended up fucking his best employee in the back seat of his car on my graduation day and I was hooked from then. I only wanted to fuck older black men with big dicks!!! More BBC Kerry in the members community But Our Families Weren't"! They have no children. Mary is a former deputy head teacher, and Jake worked for the post office before retiring. Mary is white and Jake is black, originally from Trinidad. He was horrified that I could contemplate marrying a black man, and I soon learned that most people felt the same way.
The first years of our marriage living in Birmingham were hell — I cried every day, and barely ate. Love against the odds: Mary's father threw her out when she decided to marry Jake in , left. Decades on, they couldn't be happier together. People would point at us in the street. Then I gave birth to a stillborn son at eight months. I met Jake when he came over during the war from Trinidad, as part of the American forces stationed at the Burtonwood base near my home in Lancashire.
We were at the same technical college. He was with a group of black friends and they called my friend and me over to talk. He quoted Shakespeare to me, which I loved. A few weeks later we went for a picnic, but were spotted by a lady cycling past — two English girls with a group of black men was very shocking — and she reported me to my father, who banned me from seeing him again. He is then commanded to masturbate into the cum-filled condom.
The wife and Bull should both comment on how the condom is much too big for the cuck's small penis. After the Bull has had sex with the wife once or twice, and she is well stretched, invite the cuck to have a go at his wife.
After the Bull fucks the wife and cums inside her, have the wife lie on her back and spread her legs. Then instruct the cuckold to sit between her legs and have the wife masturbate, while she looks at her cuck and tells him to look at a "satisfied pussy" and how much better and more satisfying the Bull was than the cuckold.
The Bull calls the wife every night before she goes to bed, or right after she turns in, for intimate conversations. This will have her thinking of the Bull every night as she falls asleep, and may have the added advantage of annoying or threatening the cuckold. Consider having the cuckold perform oral sex on the wife while she is talking to the Bull.
Have the cuckold tie his wife to their marital bed spread eagle and blindfold her for the Bull to arrive. Then the Bull makes the cuckold watch as he repeatedly uses the wife, and doesn't allow her to be untied until after the Bull has left.
For more spice, the Bull could arrive with a friend to share the wife. The cuckold and the wife may or may not be aware that another friend would be coming over. All three go to an adult theater. The Bull and the wife sit together upfront, with the cuckold sitting alone in the back, watching anything that might happen. The Bull and wife may also choose to enter a private booth, but without the cuckold.
Whatever happens is between the Bull, the wife and anyone else they might include. The cuckold may only observe. The Bull gets the wife to perform a sex act she seldom or never does with her cuckold, such as an orgy, threesome, flashing, anal, DP, public sex, etc. It s important that the wife agrees only because of her desire to please the Bull.
It's even better if she agrees to do something for the Bull which she has never done for her cuckold, even though the cuckold may have spent years trying to get her to do so.
The Bull places the demand on the cuckold and wife that they are to stop having intercourse. This is up to the wife to enforce, as the Bull will not always be around. However, if the wife enforces the ban it sends a strong signal to the cuckold that the Bull and the wife are in agreement, making them the couple and him the outsider. When the wife visits the Bull at his home for sex he attempts to persuade her to stay the entire night and go home the next morning hint - alcohol is your friend!
Another option is for the Bull and wife to prearrange this in advance, without the cuckold knowing that the wife will not be returning home that night. The Bull takes the wife out of town on a business or pleasure trip, and they travel together as a couple.
This trip could be anything from a weekend to multiple weeks. The cuckold, wife and Bull visit a swing club, group sex event, or attend a house party, with the Bull and the wife acting as the couple, and the cuckold restricted to watching only. If there are other single males attending then the cuckold must join and remain with the singles group.
The cuckold should also drive to and from this event, allowing the wife and Bull to play in the back seat. The cuckold needs to be present. The Bull makes similar comments, that he wishes she were his wife so he could give her the cock she needs every night, etc.
Have the cuckold drive his wife to the Bull's home, with her wearing nothing but a full-length coat, lingerie, or even being fully naked for the very brave!
An option would be to have the cuckold wait in the living room. If the cuckold remains present and watching, the Bull could potentially have him do this whenever they take a break or change positions, and between every fuck, with it becoming a combination of cleanup and preparation.
Have the wife kneel in front of the Bull, and have her cuckold stand behind her, holding her head in his hands while the Bull fucks her mouth until he cums. The Bull texts the cuckold the day of a "date", telling the cuckold how much the Bull is looking forward to borrowing the wife for the night. The Bull should make it clear that he intends to use the wife as his sexual plaything and he will be doing things with her that the cuckold cannot accomplish.
The Bull could also instruct the cuckold what he wants the wife to be wearing, whether he wants her pussy shaved, etc. The Bull shares the wife openly with others, without the permission of the cuckold the wife may or may not have a say depending on their relationship.
This sharing could include friends, other Bulls, or couples. It could include threesomes or group play, at private parties or swinging functions. The cuckold has no approval and must accept anyone the Bull chooses to play with the wife. The Bull and wife arrange times for the Bull to stop by without the cuckold being aware he was coming.
The wife should never apologize for the Bull's actions, and should always act accommodating, as if she is eager to have him over any time. This is exceptionally powerful when the wife agrees to allow the Bull to interrupts any plans the couple may have had, such as dinner plans, family time, etc. This is particularly effective if the Bull has been out drinking and is horny and demanding. The Bull arrives and gets right to it. He fucks the wife in their bed, perhaps with the cuckold laying there beside her.
The Bull cums in the wife, then immediately dresses and departs, leaving the cuckold and wife alone to deal with the aftermath. Use a video camera to tape the Bull and the wife having sex, and then have her go home to her cuckold to show him the videotape. The Bull or wife can also use a cell phone to take pics or vids while having sex, and send them to the cuckold. The wife or Bull can make copies, and tease the cuckold that they will show his closest friends the footage if he steps out of line and doesn't do what is demanded.
The Bull 'titty fucks' the wife, while making the cuckold lay beside her with a bottle of lube. Have the hubby continuously apply liberal amounts of lube to his wife's cleavage until the Bull cums.
After the wife begins seeing a Bull regularly, she makes her cuckold start to move selected personal items from the master bedroom over to the guest room. She might add a pillow to the bed that the Bull prefers, or make other changes to the bedroom that signifies her desire to customize it for her preferred sex partner. She makes him jack off into Kleenex, toilet paper or his own hand.
She might turn the table on him, forbidding him to use towels or tissues at all, and instead makes him lick up his own cum whether it be after masturbating, or cumming anywhere in or on her body.
When out together in public the wife teases the cuckold by commenting on other men, pointing out those she finds attractive and exactly what she finds sexy about them. She should willingly admit which of them might have potential as lovers. Once introduced, the wife can then decide if the cuckold is to stay or leave. She should tease him that she wants to be fucked by one of those men, and remind him that they would surely flaunt it in the cuckolds face if one of them fucked her.
When she sees any of them she should actively flirt with them and let her cuckold see her doing so. If she does get the chance, she should fuck them and then flaunt it to her cuckold. The Bull picks up the wife at her home, and then takes her out for a traditional, romantic dinner at an upscale restaurant, with drinks and dancing afterward.
While using the appropriate amount of discretion, they enjoy a normal date together, with the wife being treated as a courted lady, fanning her romantic needs. At the end of the night the Bull brings her back home, and they go straight into the bedroom to consummate their night by mating in the marital bed. Thursday How to cuckold your husband. Posted by Amy at 4: Threeway relationships are the bestest! Creating the threeway Cuckold relationship. An enjoyable cuckolding environment is one where everyone involved receives what they need from the relationship.
For a cuckold couple with a steady bull or lover, this means practicing cuckolding together as a group. In my view, cuckolding is most effective and enjoyable when practiced as a threesome and with all being present sometimes. Wives who primarily meet their boyfriend away from home are missing out on some of the best experiences and benefits in cuckolding.
Some couples new to the sharing lifestyle are initially intimidated by the idea of a semi-steady relationship with a man outside the marriage. The reality is that a steady guy or a few reliable companions for the wife is not only less risky in terms of physical and health safety, but is much more rewarding in terms of an overall, fulfilling experience. This regular contact will probably lead to deeper friendships and even some level of emotional connection between the wife and her lover s.
To do this she needs to create situations for both men to meet and interact. Perhaps instead of meeting her lover out, she should propose having him pick her up at home, so he can be introduced to the husband. Ladies, invite your lover in for a few minutes before you leave on your date. Let him know beforehand this is what you want. Show excitement and let him know how much the situation turns you on. Kiss him openly in front of your husband. This may all seem puzzling at first, but both men will certainly identify with something that turns you on.
This way the boyfriend can also see for himself that your husband has accepted a secondary role and is a willing participant in the relationship. While out on dates and when talking with your lovers later, you should make a point of discussing your husband and his reactions to your dating; detail how excited your husband gets watching you prepare for your date, for example, or explain how your shared fantasies have led you to this point.
Enjoying your boyfriend at home… Another suggestion is to invite your lover over for dinner at your place before you go out. This can give everyone an hour or more to openly talk and even discuss the lifestyle. The more time the three of you are together the more everyone will become comfortable within their roles. Use these times to establish which man is your priority.
This demonstrates that you are the one in control when your boyfriend is present. You may even need to be a bit aggressive with an inexperienced guy, even an otherwise dominant one, until he becomes comfortable with the situation and gets his head around the idea of you spurning your husband for him. Do not be bashful during this important phase. I know this can be a challenge for many wives unfamiliar with being the aggressor, but simply think of it as a game and force yourself until it becomes a bit more natural.
Once your boyfriend warms up to it all you will no longer be playing that role! This all lets your boyfriend come to better understand the dynamics of cuckolding, and also lets him directly see and feel how it turns you on to do it. As you move further into the relationship, encourage contact between both of your men. Give your husband several options to mention - either whole outfits or even simply ask if he wants you to wear a skirt or a dress. Eventually, picking you up at home and having dinner with you at home will then lead to making out at home and going to bed without ever leaving the house.
Dating out is still recommended, but sometimes you want to go out…and sometimes you just want to stay in. Do it both ways with you lover, in the presence of your husband. Some couples approach this gradually. At first the husband may just observe the foreplay and fondling, before the wife and lover dismiss the husband, or adjourn to the privacy of a bedroom. Graduating to full on sex in front of the husband can be exciting for you the wife, but it can also be intimidating for your boyfriend.
One way to overcome this intimidation is to make it clear to your boyfriend is your primary focus and your husband is only an observer. Combined with previous events leading up to this point, and your bolstering his confidence, your boyfriend should begin to feel much less anxious taking you in your bed with your husband watching.
At this point, you begin to include your husband more by extending the foreplay outside the bedroom; getting naked for your boyfriend sooner, taking foreplay well beyond petting, even engaging in sex in the den, living room, etc. Once this threshold is passed, your boyfriend will become comfortable in his position and should begin to enjoy asserting himself with you and your husband, and will be the one to call your husband into the bedroom to witness him entering you.
Good luck and happy loving! Posted by Amy at 3: Wednesday A different kind of blind date. We've all been on blind dates. Do they ever turn out well, by the way? I'm going to tell you about a different kind of blind date. This one definitely is more predictable and usually a lot more fun than the kind of blind date we all know and hate! If you're a woman and you read this blog regularly, then it's safe to say you fuck around like me or you think about it.
I enjoy having lovers in my life, in my bed, on the side, whatever. But it's not always possible to be with someone. I'm not always dating someone. They're not always available. Sometimes life just gets in the way. When that happens I don't stop having great sex.
I just have to be more creative, and that usually involves my husband contrary to some of my blogs I still love fucking him! Years ago we tried something that we still do, usually when I can't find the time or the right guy for the real thing. We call it a "Blind Date". It's really a sensory deprivation experience masquerading as a sex act, but don't rule it out. It's hotter than you might think and to me a satisfying way to get along until my next real date.
I love to fantasize. I do it more than most women, and probably more than some men. I didn't always fantasize. But once I began to do it I found I liked it.
The more I liked it the more I did it. Soon it began to help my sex life and partly because of fantasies I ended up in this lifestyle and fucking other men.
When I can't see others, I fantasize more often. Here's one way to take your fantasies to a new level. Fantasies are in our minds obviously. But they often get clouded with input from everyday life.
I found that if you can block out your everyday life then your mind can better focus on your fantasy. Think blindfolds and earplugs! Sight and sounds are our largest senses.
Take them away and you won't have as much distraction. You can think more clearly and you can fantasize better. Here are the basics for a Blind Date: The wife is blindfolded where she cannot see anything, even out of the sides.
Cotton pads on my eyes work best, held in place by a blindfold and maybe a scarf on top of that too, to keep anything from slipping off. That ruins everything instantly! CVS sells a good quality, soft, moldable wax earplug.
Sensory deprivation is important to allow the woman to focus ONLY on her fantasies. She shouldn't be able to hear anyone or anything at all.
Any sound intrudes into her fantasy. The husband leaves the bedroom. The wife is on the bed naked, or wearing a negligee she would want to wear for a lover. She begins to pleasure herself to get things going. She is NOT even married in her mind. ALL of her thoughts are as if she was with that lover at that moment. It takes some mental discipline. The husband stays out of the room for a sufficient time for the wife to get aroused and be totally into her fantasy.
She needs to be in her own world and absorbed in her fantasy completely by the time the husband comes back in. For some, laying back naked and spread legged on the edge of the bed works. Doggy on the edge of the bed or chair or even on the floor works well for others. Regardless of position, the wife should be spread wide, very wet, and very aroused.
In her mind she should have been through the foreplay part of lovemaking with her fantasy lover, and ready for "him" to fuck her enter the husband as surrogate. Have extra lube on hand to insure that initial penetration is very pleasurable. NO talking by the husband! This is about the WIFE. Scream out his name. Beg him to fuck you. Whatever you would really say and do with him. When the wife is ready after minutes the husband comes in SILENTLY and enjoys the sight of his wife masturbating and aroused by thoughts of another man.
Since the wife cannot see or hear she has no idea she is no longer alone. Minimal foreplay is called for. The husband should play with her just a little. Groping her breasts, clit massage, pussy fingering works well, just not a lot of touching places that don't need touching, and not too much of it. After all the wife knows the husbands touch, and that can ruin the fantasy. NO thought of her husband should be in her mind at all.
Women — Give feedback. Doing so WILL make it more real for you. Also do not be afraid to stimulate yourself to orgasm if need be, to keep the fantasy going in your head. If you need to finger your clit or squeeze your breast, do so. Afterwards - no questions and NO talking! Or consider masturbating to one last orgasm, thinking of a second fuck by your lover trust me your husband will not be able to leave until you finish.
Go to another room and dress. Your wife will dress and follow later. That way she doesn't remove her blindfold and see you, which would destroy the illusion that she just had sex someone else. For some women the hardest part is getting comfortable with the idea of a fantasy of another man having sex with her.
This is a learned thing, but very enjoyable once they are able to get into it. The first time may seem odd. TRY it again and it will be better. After a few times you will begin to enjoy it. She is in control of her fantasy. Typical scene — The husband goes to the living room, and starts the countdown for a predetermined time min. The wife goes the bedroom, puts on a sheer nightie or gets nude , puts in her earplugs and blindfolds herself.
Then she lies back on the bed and begins to push away all thoughts of her husband. She imagines herself with her fantasy lover. She massages her breasts as he would, tugging at her nipples, rubbing her body as her lover would. As she warms up she moves her hands lower, along her stomach, rubbing her legs and her thighs, using the complete darkness and silence to block out any thoughts other than the man she most wants to be with.
Her fingers find her slit and she begins to stroke herself as she imagines and wishes! She may reach an orgasm like this, or not, depending on what she prefers. She should continue to masturbate and stimulate herself while she waits. After the agreed time the husband silently comes in the room. The wife has no idea he is there. He may even watch her for a minute.
Then he touches her a little not too much. Rubbing her breasts, fingering her, etc. She will have no idea he is there until she's touched. The wife instantly assimilates his touch into her fantasy. After intercourse, the husband withdraws and leaves immediately.
There is no talking or further intimacy. The wife might lay there and enjoy the afterglow as she comes down from the erotic high. When she removes her blindfold and earplugs she is completely alone, and the fantasy of being with another man is intact. She then gets dressed and rejoins her husband. At that point some couples prefer to act as if nothing happened.
No discussion and no questions at that time later is fine. Doing so immediately will detract from the appeal of the fantasy. Others like to take this opportunity to move into another phase of fantasy, where the wife has just returned to her husband after the illusion of having a sexual tryst with another man, leading to additional sexual fantasies.
It's whatever works for you. If you don't like it, try it again. If after three times you don't like it, then you're probably reading the wrong blog. Posted by Amy at This is a repost of something my husband got from a friend who is therapist. He believed this has helped him understand his feelings better and deal with any bouts of jealousy that he feels when I am with someone else. I'm posting it because he suggested it. Maybe this can help others. One of the things pilots learn about flying is that many of the principals associated with flying go contrary to what would be common sense on four wheels.
Certain things that you must do as a pilot will violate every instinct in your body -- such as when your airplane stalls, you need to point it directly at the ground to pick up speed and resume flying. When we find ourselves in an "in love" situation, you could say that we trade in our wheels for wings. This new environment requires that we adapt to new logic.
It is not always easy to keep an intimate relationship aloft, and one of the most disturbing things that can threaten staying aloft is the feeling of jealousy. Compersion is about embracing and enjoying the fact that someone we love can find sexual pleasure, or even have feelings, with someone else. Becoming comfortable with compersion is akin to pointing the nose of an airplane down when you go into a stall created by jealousy.
Looked at another way, compersion is the full appreciation of another person's pleasure and indeed their existence -- something many relationships could use a lot more of. If we could indeed get there, this would be an excellent resolution for jealousy and other problems. Our relationships would be more interesting, more compassionate and best of all, make room for who we really are while allowing our partner to be whom they really are.
More than being a protective measure, compersion is a daring and courageous way to explore the emotional dynamics of pleasure and human interaction, as well as a way to work through problems created by attachment and guilt. It's a way to take a constructive approach to shame, embarrassment, or a sense of potential loss.
For people who are considering opening up to their relationship to other partners, compersion makes the process safe and sane, and ultimately enhances the relationship. It does not happen at once. Compersion takes practice and dedication, though like many things there are breakthroughs along the way; quantum leaps that take us from one dimension of feeling and self-awareness to another. It helps to think of compersion as a process rather than an emotion.
It is a way of living, of perceiving the world, and of conceiving of who you and your partner are. It is a way of loving and respecting people as independent from you, something that's extremely challenging in a culture that extols the virtues of selfishness, possessiveness, control, and narcissism.
Compersion is a way of creating closeness where there might instinctively be division. Our Environment of Competition and Abandonment. While we're considering the subject of relationships, and jealousy in particular, we need to remember that in our society, the ideas we are given about love are competitive. Only one person is going to "get" you; for any individual, the chances are six billion to one.
There seems to be not enough of anything for all of us, so we have to compete; we have to be Number One. Most of our ideas about life and love are based on scarcity and possession. Even on a planet where you have billions of people without partners, many of them can't find a date on a Friday night.
Have you ever considered how twisted that is? Such as when you're home alone and horny and want some company, and you realize there must be millions of people in this same condition? On a planet with so many people, you would think there would be nothing easier to find than other people.
On a planet where so many people want sex, you would think there would be plenty of it. Yet even in this state of total abundance, we manage to turn it around and live in the midst of a horrid shortage. No matter what people may have, or need, unless they're willing to give and receive -- generally in that order -- there is no interaction or exchange possible.
That is part of the problem. In the desert of life, we tend to fear two things. What we fear most is abandonment. Even if that one special person has found us, or vice versa, the big fear is that we will lose them; that they will find someone else. Often, even when we find love, we live with a sense of incredible frailty, sensitivity and imminent doom.
This is usually based on the fear of not being good enough; indeed, at times on a total absence of self-esteem. Loss of self-esteem can lead to jealousy in short order.
The second thing we fear is being too close to others, and having our true selves and secrets exposed. A great many people don't like who they are inside, and are terrified about the prospect of exposing this to others. Many people survive by making up a fake character, and if someone gets close to us, we may fear that they'll figure out we're empty and thus undeserving of love. So, our relationships and desire to relate to one another are based on need created by being alone, and the rules are set by the fear of abandonment and the fear of uber-intimacy.
This is different than it might be, were we surrounded and taught a philosophy of sharing, emotional abundance and self-acceptance. An Alternative Theory of Jealousy Before I offer a more detailed description and brief history of the idea of compersion, let's first visit an alternative theory of jealousy. Some feel that jealousy is about potential loss, or the desire to be preferred, or a sense of competition because we all want the best, or it is a kind of extreme envy, where you want what someone else has.
These are superficial issues that conceal the true spiritual matter beneath jealousy -- and if we stay on the surface, we miss the benefit we can get from encountering the deeper levels directly. Jealousy will haunt us and never become a teacher or ally. It can only be faced down and dealt with in order to overcome it. Jealousy is actually the eruption of attachment, usually when a relationship is threatened by an outsider.
The threat is a problem because of how closely we identify with our relationships as a major source of self-worth. We often cling to one another due to the inherently transient nature of relationships, and sometimes out of material survival. Obsessive clinging is a struggle with a deeper issue -- we live in a constantly shifting, often hostile, world, where we often seem to have no solid ground to stand on.
We struggle with trust, and the uncertainty of future. Jealousy evokes some or all of these conditions, manifesting itself as something that feels as ominous as the hand of death. However, there is another factor involved — the ironic association of pleasure. Imagine a situation where you suspect fear your partner is having a sexual experience with someone else. The jolt of panic or intense anxiety that comes with this perception has a unique side affect. Even though we might feel panic, fear and even anger toward our partner, there is also passion involved.
Beneath those painful feelings there is an undercurrent of erotic energy — invoking a sense of passion, which is a form of pleasure. If one can push aside the initial fear and feelings of jealousy they are often surprised to discover a sense of arousal. Human psychology offers many theories for this, including sexual competition, etc.
Indeed, this can be a smart survival technique. Rather than fighting the pain, focusing on conflict and endangering the relationship one should instead embrace the more pleasurable sense of arousal.
In other words, the only way out is to dive in headfirst. Upon a realization that she had likely been with another I dove straight into the feelings. Rather than focusing on the pain and negative feelings, I recognized how erotic it felt to imagine her being sexual. I let those visions play out, over and over until I had made friends with them.
At first my jealousy continued to circle. But in the ever-creeping flames of jealousy, my pain seemed to gradually burn up. Soon I found it much easier and pleasurable to focus on the arousal aspect.
As a result I found myself accepting her needs, and the love I felt for her grew stronger. In truth, I was becoming a different more mature and more accepting person. Later in our relationship she met another woman, and the two of them started a sexual relationship that eventually involved feelings that bordered on love. Their sex was passionate, beautiful, and incredible to behold -- and many times, it excluded me. I could freak out, panic and feel abandoned, or I could expand my awareness and embrace what they shared.
At first I lived with the dual feelings; the pain of being excluded, and the exquisite enjoyment from being a participant and witness to the pleasure they shared together.
Through this process I learned of compersion. Once many people get over the initial shock of their partner being with another, if they would they search their true feelings they would likely find the idea of their partner having sex to be erotic. But it's definitely a form of pleasure that contradicts everything we're taught about relationships, and especially marriage. So many people do not give any consideration to the possibility of pleasure.
They immediately turn to jealousy, giving it free reign to spread all of its destructiveness. In truth, you cannot do anything about how other people feel or what they want.
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